Loneliness

A new dog for pet?

2012-01-02T23:31:00.001-08:00

In fact, I haven't got any dog before. Kind of worried if I cannot cope with the dog. It was a breed that Joel had when he was younger. I think is Shetland dog? He is given up by their owner due to some shifting house reason. Joel send a message to her, hopefully we can view the dog soon. He is around 8 years old, hopefully we can spend the last year with him. He looks like a very well-groomed dog. Hopefully, he do not bark very loud. It will be first time I will be handling a dog by the way. Hopefully, he will change the view that I have for dogs. Erm, dog-walking and many more came into my mind. =)

Jesus is more faithful

2011-12-11T05:17:00.000-08:00

Today suppose to go swimming but than RAINING. Sigh. Ok. So stayed at home and rest some notes. Played guitar and learn piano from dear. Than rushed to church. Today church got one commercial to tell us be a child again and find Daddy God on Xmas. Really miss being a child suddenly. When there is not much to do but to sleep the whole day. The invitation card was given at the end of the church service, the front letter was come back to love. Yes, He is our first love. His love and faithfulness that never fails. Today, one happy thing is His faithfulness for us never fails, but we human fails. A lot of people is coming to know the truth of Jesus. Thank you Jesus for blessing me. You are better than iPhone, better than any nice clothing that I have own. Can't wait to see you on Xmas. Can't wait to celebrate the birth of Jesus! Can't wait to see the story alive again. When I work in about one more year time, I will go Israel, the holy land, to walk through the path that Jesus walks before. Breathe the air He breathe, baptise in the lake that He is being baptized. =D
Soon, I will be going Medan. Can't wait.

3 days of MC!

2011-12-06T20:19:00.000-08:00

Firstly, I must thank my bf for being such a good one. Despite my scoldings, he still took care of me. =X. Yeah, I keep on scolding him because he do tepid sponging on my forehead which made me felt super uncomfortable but it works. I slept well in fact. I was having chills and tremors due to the flu, having bad aches on my back and neck. I hate to be sick at times! It is just so frustrating. The doctor gave me 3 days of MC, but i seriously think my fever got to do with my gum infection. First is my swollen gum, than throat start to pain, followed by fever. Argh, when I start to work, I must remove my wisdom tooth, I seriously think it got something to do with my wisdom tooth. But now I am a lot better already, thank God. Oh my, I felt sleepy already due to the side effect of the medications. Oh well, time to rest =D.

Congratulations!

2011-12-04T20:14:00.000-08:00

Firstly, congratulations to Rizuwan and Shara in getting married on 4th Dec 2011! It is just one day after Shara's birthday! That is one good way in remembering both anniversary and wife's birthday! LOL. Shara's wedding gown is so captivating that I cannot take my eyes off! Rizuwan's suit is like those emperor suit. But it looks so good on them. A pity is that the chinese do not want this in their wedding and that includes mine. LOL. But it was a good day for both of them I guess. Congrats once again!

Secondly, congrats to myself for passing both essays! It wasn't really easy! I looked at the comment that they have made. I was a little disappointed in myself. One thing is that, I do not know what questions to ask the lecturers in regards to how am I going to write my essays. Many a times, I depend on my guts to write the essays. But I did well for ethnics more than research. Is a lot more! But well, I have managed to pass both essays! Phew~

Anyway, counting down to departure date to Medan! I am so excited for the famous Lake Tobar's~. I heard that the scene is magnificent. Well, I am still considering whether to bring my camera along or not. Or could just bring my iPhone 4S to take the picture as the picture produced by the hand phone is also considered to be quite good except for the flash. The flash wasn't that great. But I think the hand phone HD is going to get my eye degree higher as it is so clear and I just wanted to avoid the hand phone sometimes.

Time to rush my essays!

2011-11-27T19:38:00.000-08:00

This time round, an essay of 3000 words. Pastor Prince message yesterday was to remind us that with God, there is nothing against us. Although sometimes I felt that my life is a bit hard to get by, but I still did manage to live another day with a smile! Today, I might be a little sad but still it doesn't change a fact that I am able to see the sun again =D. Every moment waking up, filled with hope and love from Daddy God, that kind of feeling just made me felt super alive!
Was reading some comments that is being made by foreigners about Singaporean's academic result is bad. Well, in a ranking system of education. There would be people who are good in studies and there would be people who are not. However, a foreigner coming to Singapore making such an insensitive comments will only bring further unhappiness in the government's policy. Whatever it is, come to Singapore, stop criticizing Singapore and it's culture. The fact is, there are foreigners who are lousy in our education system, but did we bring it up at all? =). Peace.

Last day of Doctor Hannah

2011-11-25T06:42:00.000-08:00

Dr Hannah, thank you so much for being here for us. Have a safe trip back home than. We will be visiting you next year. Today is a good and long day~ I have ended my class at 12pm. So went to library to search the book on my related essays. Next week, we will be meeting Minister of Health and State to introduce them on our course.
Ganesh, May, Naveen, Joel and me went to watch "Puss in Boots". Hilarious max. OHHHH~~~~~ =D. People who watched will know what I meant. Oh anyway, Joel this name is not meant to be pronounced as Jo el. It is supposed to pronounce as Joe without the el pronunciation. Something new I have learn. The latest board games "Warhammer 40,000" is something everyone seems to be talking and playing. Joel is one of them. HAHA. Max and me were trying to plan a Xmas BBQ so that we can play some board games on that day and have fun. Well, before that we gotta rush our work a little first. First 2 essays result will be out on 2 Dec. 2 Dec is really a busy day for me! I have my result out on that day, SJAB BBQ and my Hep B immunization jab. 3rd Dec is Shara's wedding. 4th Dec is Joel's nephew wedding. 5-9 Dec either one day is to meet up with Alina and co. for movie. on 17 Dec to fly off! Tomorrow will need to go down to Boys' Brigade room to check the first aid equipment and to stock up. Hope everything went well. Gotta go! =))

Last day of Doctor Speed

2011-11-24T06:48:00.000-08:00

May God strength be with you, Dr Speed. =D I will be seeing him again soon in June next year. He said he will bring us to see the undermine tunnel in London. Today, we have a mini celebration for both of the lecturer. I see all the picture that is taken from their country. The first thing in my mind appear is that our Manchester University looked like the school that Harry Potter attend! Looks cool. I think I will go around to look at churches as well. In a far away land, trying to be close to my Daddy God =). Can't wait for my Medan trip. Hehe.

No more sad stuff

2011-11-23T05:29:00.000-08:00

I have decided on not to post sad stuff anymore. Life is too short to reminisce unhappy things. Friends will be still be my friends if they regard me to be one. Recently think a lot of stuff and realizing that there is a lot of people with evil heart. Who jealous and envy and try to stop people from being happy. I dislike cynical people as well. If you want to be cynical, than please let it be you in your own world and try to be cynical. Let your belief ruin you. But please do not affect others with your cynical behavior. I shall try to post one happy thing every day. =D.
Today the lecturer from SIT came in and told us that we have do well. Miss Chia Yen Yen (ADON of KKH) today told us to tell the nay sayers to shut up. They have put in a lot of effort in this course and finally they have made it. This course was plan from 2009 to 2011. She is an inspiring leader to look up to, a very firm yet humble lady. I have a tough time in going through the course initially and Maxim always standing by my side helping me. Thank you Jesus that you have send a good classmate for me to help me through my rough patches now but I will endure as the rainbow always come after a big pour. I have heard from my classmate as some of them are under 80k bond and I gasp. That is a huge amount of money! But pursuing a degree with honors, nothing to be regret about as it is the first course that provide honors other than NUS. Next year, I will be going to UK, I am really looking forward to visit our classmate in Manchester. =D.
Now, I have another thing to looking forward to. That is Medan trip on 17 Dec to 21 Dec, I will be rendering first aid coverage with Joel for the trip. It will be an interesting trip as it is also CIP trip =D. The place is filled with waterfall and mountains. We are going to stay in five star hotel as well. I am really feeling very excited for it. Alright, I will be having an examination tomorrow. So, i shall update tomorrow than.

Cheers,
Faith

I am so stressed up

2011-10-06T22:45:00.001-07:00

=(. Steve Job passed away and yes that is a beside thing I want to type. I am so stressed up because of the quantitative studies. Sigh. Jia YOU~

I am so stressed.

2011-09-28T04:37:00.000-07:00

I have just submit my 800 plus words essay, no right or wrong as they are going to give me comments on how we prepare our thing. Reference was one easy deal and everything was so clear, but need to ask Dr regarding the reference again to double confirm. One thing good is they can check our work if we were to submit in, that's good because probably they can help us to go into the right path. But I am so tired, is like suffocating. =( Everything so lost, for now is the transition period and Dr Carole was telling us not to feel scare as they are there for us, felt much better.

Was invited to go to Joel's cousin wedding. Gulp, one table is 1300. OMG. Well, Joel and me was planning for a sea side wedding and I have checked that area to be 700 per table. Wedding is expensive. =(. Gua Gua. Going off to read notes le. BTW, university no textbook, everything is self directed, you gotta dl, print yourself but guess what, NYP photocopying is cheap. That's what I am proud of NYP. HAHA.

Started school

2011-09-24T02:25:00.000-07:00

School is whole new thing with new people that I am facing be it sucky people or what, I have to deal with it. Is it a good thing to be studying? Yes. I have finally knew what am I going for and why my school is good. Is a second option beside NUS, and NUS provides only degree programme unless you are damn good than u can continue in their honours course. Now, one thing is if you have a degree without honours, you only have 100 dollars extra in your salary, but if you have honours, you are taking back basic of 2.540. That is the difference between honours and normal degree and also with honours than you can proceed on to master and PhD where else normal degree cannot provide you with. This you have to be very very clear. So I am looking at honours differently and understand it because everyone can get degree but not everyone can get honours including NUS student because a few can go up to honours. Well. That is the difference. So well, we have a lot of ADONs from different hospital to come and teach us and also Prof and Dr from UK, I am totally excited about it and I really loved the way they teach, is like they really make sure u understand and they wore this askme tag which I find it very good and I think singapore nursing education lecturer got to be this standard! Because singapore lecturer are way proud and even said something like if you are unhappy, you can leave, I don't care whether you like it or not, if you are noisy I will leave. Come on man, is us the student who pays you. I think I am changing my mindset and even though I don't understand my lecturer very well, but they are willing to adapt to you and they even say thank you when you tell them that they are so soft and even scold us for not telling them. Bleah, gonna rush my 1000 essays for now.

My school starting soon.

2011-09-15T22:26:00.000-07:00

Yes, my school is finally starting soon. But I am seriously half excited half extremely upset. I don't know is to hate my mum or what. I really need physical help instead of someone listening to me and to help me knock some sense into her.
First thing, out of no where, she came up with one stupid law of her own saying mooncake festival, Joel's family have to buy her mooncake, so Joel bought one and I told her is for us so she can eat it but instead my useless brother took it and eat, of course I'm furious because the recipient was to her but yet she cooked up some stupid reason saying if I scold my brother and not letting him to eat is as if scolding her. Ok, never mind, we bought the flavors, for goodness sake, we can't even shop for mooncake ourselves! And I don't celebrate like so long ago, she grumbled the mooncake is not to her taste and she refused to eat it and throw tantrum! It is not the first time, I buy her things and she disliked it and than throw tantrum over a good will gift. She go complain to my aunt saying we bought her nothing! Maybe is my fault saying that is from my Bf to me but still it is for us too ma. The quote of present comes from heart, not the content of the gift makes one happy, come out from her mouth and I seriously feel like puking out! She point in my face saying I should know what to get for her when Joel is in overseas and for goodness sake I seriously DO NOT know what to get for her! Because whatever I buy or eat, she dislikes and refused to eat it or take it!
Second thing, she asked me how much I need per month for my studies and I said 350 after calculations. She asked me how much would I give her when I am working, I said 300 because main thing she is working and I will eat rarely at home because I hates going home. She make such a big fuss over it, come on, now is ur precious son working and she is throwing temper on me because she say I did not gave her money when I am working but she knew I am saving it for my overseas attachment but yet she still say such senseless words! And I still remember when I get my Ang pow money, despite how few people gave me actually, she asked me for the money she lend me which is 200 after second day I received my Ang pow! But yet she lend my brother 8k without ANY demand back! How would u feel? I really at my wits end. I feel worthless to stay on this earth sometimes! She say till I study university is such a bad thing! My feelings towards is trimming every single day! She can kill me, I really hope somehow or rather all this will end because I am so tired of arguing same old thing! Everyday now I come back, she harps on mooncake, money! Than why bother to ask how much I need?! Don't ask! She came back from work everyday scolding me, saying I nv do housework, but almost everyday I at Bf house! I do my laundry there, eat there! I didn't even messed up the house! I don't even had a room! Please help.. Someone.. Sigh....

Stupid Crazy Love.

2011-09-12T18:07:00.001-07:00

Stupid Crazy Love is a movie that taught us not to forget those initiate days when we are happy and even when you are getting older, always look back at think of how much you loved each other initially. Love does not concern with age, looks and even how many sex partner that he has, but us having the chinese traditional brought up manner doesn't seems to accept the fact that he actually loved us now and changes the way he behaved in the past. Well, love is big yet also simple, love keeps no record of wrong, it forgives and forgets. Love is noble. But when will I ever see it this way? Perhaps when I get a little older and more mature.

Today went to exercise half an hour and here smelly I am sitting in front of lap top typing my blog =). Teehee. So tired yet refreshed. I hope I can get fitter soon. Going to watch movie online.

Finally

2011-09-12T03:06:00.000-07:00

Finally, I have end my work and now awaiting for my school start next week. Erm, I should say this ward that I am given is the best ward so far I have ever worked in, with lots of good colleague and training. They even gave me a pen for my leaving and a good luck card. When I leave, I felt a bit sad and don't know what to do. I am able to take one whole team and yet I have to leave already. =(. I prayed that my school days will be easier.

I am also hesitating whether to buy iPad 2 or normal lap top as my mum keeps forcing me to give my lap top let my brother use and I am so sick of her threatens everyday. I was thinking a normal Macbook air but the thing is they don't have anything for presentations and I have to dl it. But I saw a CD to install that iWork for presentation. Erm. Shall see again. Maybe a ASUS lap top also not bad.

I am all excited for school again but this time round is different, no longer the same bunch of people that I am mixing it with already but the new one, but one thing that would never change is the swimming pool. I will have to swim on my own le. No more Yiru, Wang min. =(.

Off!

2011-09-04T20:44:00.000-07:00

Thank God, I have a lot of off days!!! =D. Today and tomorrow off, than afternoon, morning, afternoon and morning. Last day is saturday!!! Than off I go! =D. Finally can go study.

Well, I am a little worried though, my patient collapsed. But that isn't our fault, but there are a lot of miscommunication along the way, I feel that we can improved on, and well I guess my EN skills used to be very good and now it is still is but is the e-charting that is making me confused. Like if patient NBM, must chart at 8am as NBM. A lot of fluids I also don't know how to chart, wa lao. I hope everything goes back to paper and that is more accurate. We resuscitate the patient for like one hour and than Doctor announced her at dead. OMG. I felt very very sad. Is like if some thing is told in the first place. Than in the end is coroner's case and now they are checking as patient passed away suddenly. When the husband came in, his first sentence to the wife is he is there and he loves her very much. I felt really really sad. I was like praying in my heart and saying please don't let her go. But we tried our best, Doctors do all CPR and we tried too. Sigh. Suddenly, realise life is really very very fragile.

Went to Comex both on Saturday and Sunday to accompany Joel to buy Xbox Kinect! We bought it at 584 sing dollars with trade in of PS1 and PS2 =D. 250GB of space!!!! Woo, can dance and exercise with kinect! Looks fun! Got free CD and free wireless controller and everything! Excited in trying out soon once we get it!

Today will be my rest day and also to watch "The Cat" with Joel and friends!!! Sleeping soon. =D.

Happy birthday to me.

2011-09-01T22:37:00.000-07:00

As expected, I don't really think people will give me present anymore except for my close friends, bf and family. Living 25 years, I think I am living good in this earth and I thanked God for putting me in Singapore with healthy environments and good education system which put us in place that we could be in. Though many a times, I still feel a little upset with my family background and I should really let go of such past and move on without turning back. What I hate most now is my family keep on depending on me in EVERYTHING when there is a MAN in our house but he refused to do anything except forcing my mum to buy him a lap top(recent request) because he spoiled the lap top I gave it to him and what makes he thinks that even a new lap top won't be made spoil by him and my mum asked him to let him use my current lap top. NO WAY. Sorry. I had enough of his nonsense and will not give way because he is a working adult who can earn money and why still ask for a lap top to use when my school is starting soon? I thought of buying iPad 2 with Joel but still this is not a solution. Because my mum refused to see that HE got mistakes and just wana give in. Sian. Never mind.

On 28th August, Joel and his friend celebrated my birthday in this japanese store with 2 cup cakes and his present for me. I already suspected something going on and after that we run to the cinema to watch the Cars 2. Joel gave me a new hard disk as my hard disk spoilt like madness as it cannot be opened at ALL. OMG. Also, the hard disk came with free anti-virus cd and one mickey mouse pouch for my hard disk which I didn't even realise until I flip it over. I also developed 156 pictures of us, friends and him so that in years to come, we still can flip back and show our kids next time, 198 more pictures to be developed. That is my own birthday present for myself from myself, hehe. On actual day, Joel's daddy celebrated for me with strawberry cake, really thank God I have found a family who loves me too as he always tell people that I am his daughter but sometimes I showed black face when I am super tired but he still would always help me out as much as Joel and Jaryl (Joel's brother) even wished me happy birthday too when I am washing the dishes. We all have a wonderful time and is time to go rest. HAHA.

Yesterday, my girl friends celebrated for me as we ate in this store, never see the store name, but the hamburger is way too big and I can't eat it with my mouth so I eat it layer by layer, I didn't notice how others eat. Chit chat for a while, than we moved on to esplanade, had a quick birthday song due to wind and MBS had this music theme with the light going on (don't know what's the proper name for it) but it is always at 9.30pm I guess and of course many tourist was watching it. We played card games as well and all of us were having fun suspecting the crime scene, I thought of buying it and played it with Joel. LOL. He would like such games too. So they gave me a nice card with all of their graduation picture and with their little notes and there was such notes which really made me felt touched... I was reading it again at Joel's house because.. I just so scare I might lose another bunch of friends which I don't want to. All of them wished me well for my studies and relationship, thank you so much all again. They also gave me eau de toilette for my birthday present, it smells good =D. Thank you ladies, and we took cabbie back. I think the next time we will meet is Dorcas birthday? =D.

Hello. =)

2011-08-27T17:07:00.001-07:00

Good morning to all.
This month will be a good month as in September. 2 more weeks I will be in degree course pia-ing all the studies with all my new school mates which I find them super enthusiatic. The school expect us to have a CCA each and I was thinking joining dancing class =). Hopefully everything went well as we are the first cohort of the school and I will have a wonderful trip to UK next year for leadership programme.

I have just return from windy Bali. The airport that you land with sea waves and wind will definitely bring back some memory of me and you. When we land, we saw a deceving "Visa on arrival" and there is no other station which we could stand and so we waited patiently in the "Visa on arrival" queue and later we were told that we are on the wrong queue and they expected us to go another station to queue so that dampened a little of the starting trip. So yes, we managed to get in queue, and get our passport to get stamped and we moved on to find our tour guide with Joel's full name, and there he was, standing in the center of the pool of people and we waved to him. The van was in good condition with is just like any other good van in Singapore and what makes me irritated was him trying to sell us ideas on where to go and charged us 50 sing dollars for massage and etc. So I told Joel to ignore him as we really wanted a trip of our own, but one good thing is he didn't force the idea on us and we went for the hotel. But one thing good is that we will have daily breakfast for free, 3 dinners for free as well, isn't it awesome? Plus the fact that we don't have to pay for much fare trips money. But when we checked in, we really felt cheated as we booked a 5 star hotel in Singapore but in there, they gave us a cottage which I think the room facility is worse than 5 star room which we used to stayed in but still presentable and well, we have a balcony and what's good about Bali is that they don't have mosquitos =). So Joel and me walked along the sandy beach, here in Bali, there isn't much to shop around though. So we walked along the trail and settle down for a lunch for about 20 sing dollars which I think is quite expensive and we sat down for quite a while to enjoy the wind, chit chat. So we walked back, and yeah we walk till dinner time at the hotel and we went for a full body massage, it was around 66 sing dollars for both of us for one hour and I still think it is way expensive. HAHA. Their massage was good and well, makes me feels refreshed and we got a free herbal tea. So we went for dinner at the hotel and it was way good with appetizer and main, ending with ice cream and fruits. So, we went back to our cottage and rest. Second day, we went for breakfast at the hotel, quite normal the food, wasn't really to our appetite. So we went for sun tan, to snorkel in the sea and to take this glass bottom boat to see the coral and feeding the fish. The sea seems angry though, we were all flung around on the boat, and the man who brought us out fall onto the glass bottom hole, HAHAHAHAHA. So they gave us life vest and snorkel device and yes we jumped into the sea to see the coral and look around. It was those scene like in cinema that you wished you were there, and seeing those fish and coral but the sea was really strong, the boat almost hit us few times and we went up as I drank too much salt water and Joel was sea-sicked. So we headed back to the beach and they charged us like 50 for an hour and people if you think Bali is cheap, IT IS NOT. You have to bargain to get your deal done. So after this, we went back to the cottage and bath to leave for our Kechak dance performance at Uluwatu. So our Mr friendly guide was waiting for us and he brought us to a gift shop and a factory of coffee making which is named Luwak coffee which is ranking number 7 in the whole wide world. But again, it is pissing me off as why do they keep bringing us to such places and their bloody coffee isn't cheap, they want US dollar, and some more for one packet of pure coffee is US 126 if I am not wrong. They still allowed us to try the coffee but we didn't buy any. They don't allow one packet purchase but one bag. And we politely tell the guy that we aren't interested in their product at all LOL. So we went straight to Uluwatu for our dance performance. The sea view is magnificent, it really is, it is like those scene that only appear in Harry Potter's movie, the wind, the view and everything makes me feel so relaxed. Plus with the cheeky monkey which will sneak on you to steal your things, and so we were on the way for our performance. I waited quite long for the toilet as I am really urgent but to my surprise, their toilet was really clean although it was way up in the mountain. So while waiting for performance, there was another view by the side which caught my attention and that is SUN SET. OMG. I have never seen a sun set and infront of me as well. Breath taking. The performance was just so-so and it doesn't catch my attention as much as the sun set. So we met our guide and on our way to DINNER, which Joel and me were waiting for. So we get on the van and to our dinner side, and I forget the name of the restaurant thought BUT I will remember that dinner =D. They placed us facing the sea and it was directly infront of us! Listening to sea waves, having dinner by the sea on the sand, you gotta be amazed at their sand which will never fly into your food or flies that will irritated you to the max by making your leg itch. There came a band, singing infront of us and one of the song is "Tong Hua". Very very romantic for those people if you wana propose, HAHA. Sea waves, sand, they will be my friends for very long. So after dinner, we went back to our cottage and rest for the third day which we are looking forward to. SURFING.
Third day, as usual went for our free breakfast, and than wait for Mr Friendly guide. But it wasn't him, it was the guy from the sea sport activity man, so we followed him to the sea and realised we got cheated again as they don't provide surfing and expect us to pay 14 sing dollars to send us to Hard Rock hotel. So we went to Hard rock hotel theme and look at those guitars which famous Rock singer played it before. And there were more shopping stores and the beach with super lots of ang mo and naked tanning. LOL. So we waited a while before deciding to surf and there come this man, saying to teach us, for 2 hours for both of us is 50 sing dollars as well. And I think is reasonable, so we went for the lesson and I fell more than I stand on the board. LOL. But it wasn't pleasant feeling at all, each time I fell, I felt suffocated in the sea, like I would die like that. HAHA. But well, I get the experience with SEVERE BURNT, and bruising. So we shopped around, it wasn't cheap at all their stuff. Any tee there is 50 sing, and I realise Bali is a Hindu religion country and they placed this offerings of flowers and placed anywhere on the street, be careful that you don't step on one of those and they have a lot of statue as well placed outside doors when you entered and I felt scared because they looked so scary. But they like to use Frangipani as well to place on those statue or put in on their hair, and of course I put it too. =). And we went to hard rock for free dinner as well and I also bought some Hard Rock tee shirt, earrings and pin as well to support the breast cancer foundation and the pin was limited edition, only 100 in the whole wide world =D, we also went for the hard rock songs performance in the late evening as well, the atmosphere is wonderful with lots of caucasian and songs. But I was a little uncomfortable and we have to go back to hotel already but the man charged us around 20 for the taxi and that was our first time taking taxi, so we didn't bargained much and we went back both a little tipsy. HAHA, and managed to make our way back to our cottage, you know the way back to our cottage is so scary. No one is walking along it, everyone and everywhere seems super quiet and of course, with the 2 little statue at the entrance make it more scary. So we quickly bath and went to sleep. It was a real knock out.
The last day, did nothing, except taking breakfast and lying on the bed and packing our bag. The trip was fun and everything but it is way expensive to live there as a tourist as they really will think of ways to cheat your money, the people wasn't honest too when they return your changes, they will not give you back full amount, so you gotta check your changes as they take away a little. But I think it isn't fair as we tourist brings only a little amount only yet they still do this kind of thing. And most importantly is bargained. =). And please save up a little to pay airport tax at the end, lucky we didn't spend all and we only bring 550 sing dollars for the 2 of us =), we still have some spare. Enjoy people, hopefully next time you go Bali, you know what to expect but the sea view there is really awesome and massage! Woohoo.

Hello!

2011-08-26T08:06:00.000-07:00

Long time didn't post anything!
First update
1) I have just completed my Bali trip with love.
Second update
2) I have start to take the whole team during my work place.

=). Awesome trip with love, with severe sunburnt.

Which to go?

2011-07-24T22:15:00.000-07:00

Krabi or phuket. Apply AL on 22 to 26 august. =D

Thailand

2011-07-17T02:28:00.000-07:00

I am able to go for 9 days leave.. Thinking of which beach to go when in thailand.. Hope can go for massage and with a boat to see the beautiful sea. =)

Apple

2011-07-14T19:29:00.000-07:00

I hate apple. I really hope she knew it one fine day. Sister actually said that she is the most hardworking among us just because she stayed till 6.30pm when we actually end works at 4. My gosh, is this called hardworking or too lousy in work and she have to stayed back to complete her work? She only cared for some patients and changed the dressings TWICE in a day for the patients, so do you charged her? You know you looked like a bloody suck up that makes me so bloody angry? Sister put us both as doing junior. She do untill all the EN went over there and helped her, never mind. I do all the things alone in my team! Sigh, you suck la, report writing also suck to the max la. Seriously. You everyday stayed back so late, don't know what the heck you doing and what the nonsense you asking. You so are selfish as well, do skills claim yourself only than we all no need to do skills is it? She hardworking? PUI. If she is hardworking, than why she came in so early just to check those IMR only? Than those E-trolley, CD no need to check la? Stop your nonsense.
Got a letter from HDB to view house in september, hoping that we can get one of the houses there. Can imagine myself having a house with my loves one, not my mum, I won't want her to move wherever we go. Don't blamed me because you really reached my limits in tolerating and the idea of her scolding and raising her voice in my new house is WAY NONO! She won't touch my kids. No doubt she raised me up but still the treatment from her is as if I am a maid or what. So bloody dote on guys should do this and that, that's your idea man. Even if we migrate, don't come, you have nothing to work there except a road sweeper maybe? Because you can't speak English, too bad. Else, everyday seeing you in my house and scolding me and showing me a black face just because you have nothing else to do. Way NO! So you stick your buddha life, I stick to my own life.
Joel is coming back in 23 more days. So bloody hurtful those SAF people there to do such thing to him. I know Joel is constantly late for stuff but like he said at least he is late unlike some people didn't even turned up and go away scotfree ok? Bloody hell, a person is on duty 24/7 still have to punished because of his lateness and to do extra duty when he already have lesser sleep and attend those nonsense meeting when he is on sleeping day. Than never mind, on his Medal Presentation, all of you even shun him to take picture with him? What the hell?!! Who is the camera man there? Ass you know. I felt really tempted to hand in one long list of complain letter for treating a person like this! This world is so apple polished by some sweet talker is it? People likes to hear good thing and not bad thing than why be the head? You are a doctor to talk of when you do such thing to your junior and so freaking childish to perform such an action without realising what is called team work and this kind of period when people need rest you punished them to do more instead, SO IF ANYTHING WERE TO HAPPEN. WHO PAID FOR THE CONSEQUENCES? WHO? YOU?
Receive email by SIT to attend orientation and they made it compulsory and we must go to YCK stadium. ZZZ. I hate orientation. HAHA.
Happy belated birthday to Been, bought her a necklace from Swarouski. So beautiful the necklace and we went to Kim Gary to eat, so much yet so happy, pants tight, cannot breathe but am happy.
Met up with my nursing gang as well, we ate at Tang dynasty, the noodle was really good and filling but Dorcas that day eat alot huh, while Wang Min and Alina is trying the clothes, she went to buy chocolate ice cream, than went to Swensen again to eat. HAHA. I was really fun and cannot stomach down anymore. But still enjoying my presence in them. Awaiting to watch movie with them. Sigh, well is the last series of Harry potter. All good things and all things come to an end eventually. Life no chance of turning back. I love my life and I am thinking of how to decorate our new house hopefully. =)

Freaking awesome life

2011-07-01T19:38:00.000-07:00

You know I am so tired? But I believe all goodness is in his hand. It is true when He is with you, you feel happy and light. I feel like going out but I dont think any of my friend is free as we all are starting to have weird shift. Do you know out of all occupations, Nurses and government bodies job are so unstable? Especially nurses as we all need to do night shifts and that sucks. And the working hour for night shift is especially long but apparently yet there is none super idea on the long hour that we can cut to. I wished I could shake leg at home with a screen to look after my patients and get the robot to turn them, change them. All complaints from relatives? Shut down the screen and yank as much as they want because they won't really know whether am I watching the screen or not. Too much people in my work place and sometimes I don't even know what to do. Apple is getting too much, she just came to work to please our Boss, and she herself acting super big to just come to work to check on IMR. OMG. Please, you are new as well. She don't even bother to check those item. All she knows is when Boss is around, pester her to do a lot of skills, and when Boss is not around, she hide in some patient room hoping to get appreciation from patient. Lucky, people got eyes to see and irritated by you. She called Filipinos A tei, malay KAK, chinese you wana called them Jie Jie or not? Stop your sucking up. It is so irritating. And I am glad that you know we disliked you.
Last time sending parcel to Joel, will see him soon in one more month time. I really missed him. Think a lot when he is away and knew that I have changed to a better person, no one commented that I looked fierce anymore. I am so happy. Hehe. Really awaiting for the day when Joel darling is beside me. Glory to God, all good things come from you. When you're down, turn to Him, your eternal shoulder that you can lean on, share things with and many good stuff. I have never ever felt lonely when Joel is away, because Jesus brings warmth in me. All glory to you my Lord and Savior.

Congratulations to my babies.

2011-06-18T17:52:00.000-07:00

Not many people will exactly know the way I teach my cadets, some will think I am very strict, some will disliked me, some will likes me. But yesterday, I am very sad that they passed out, is like 不舍得this kind of feeling. They journey start from yesterday onwards, their dreams and goal gotta be focus and starting moving towards it. Sadness and happiness all went away just like a smoke. But yesterday also the end of my friendship with Vivian. I am so terribly upset, on what she treat friendship as. It is very clear to all seniors that POP every one of us have to wear full uniform, but she chose to say we last minute tell her about what role she is doing and she don't wana wear full uniform coz she don't have heels. Is like we have planned the POP way long ago, the excuses she made is totally unacceptable and in the end, she knows she is in the losing end, she said IT IS ME WHO SPOILED THE FRIENDSHIP BECAUSE OF SJAB. I am so totally disappointed in her. Forget it, no matter how much heart I have put in for friendships, it is still gonna be ME who never think of OUR friendship, IT IS ALWAYS ME who don't do this and that, and let ME tell you this, if I didn't cherish, I wouldn't even bothered to ask you anything and MAKE my own assumption about it. But my door is still open for her, but I guess you see our years of friendship as nothing, simply nothing, because you cannot accept the way I am or fully know who I am, because you know I will listen to you and understand you more than them, but you chose to believe that I chose them over you. Alright, it is ok. I don't want to think about it anymore. Friends come and go. I think I can move on in life alone, enough of so many sadness. And for goodness sake, your childiness makes the cadet very upset if you didn't realise for not attending their POP. Even the last photo, you also chose not to come and take, it is YOUR FUCKING CORP, OURS. Still indulge in your fucking selfish thoughts.
And please stop telling me enough, enough, enough, saying that you are in ........, than expect me to understand you. Sigh. Fuck la all.
My work place, I was being forced to take one new case when I wasn't prepared at all, I thought the first week we are all suppose to do junior work, there is new colleague, she keep rushing me to rush my report because the girl is going down to Derm clinic, of course I am nervous ma, so wana read fast, this new preceptor younger than me shouted at me READ THE NAME AND AGE, fucker, can tell me softly right, no need to shout what. I first time passing report in the ward lei, I am forced to take report by you le, of course I will have mistake de ma. Than never mind, we are taught that when we serve medication, we are not suppose to leave the medication alone and walk off. This acting sister, scolded me for not answering call bell, this is so bloody unfair, how many nurses in the morning? MORE THAN 8 U KNOW for a 18 bedded patient setting. If I leave the medication alone, later someone tampered with it, I gave the wrong drug, whose fault? She say I can put it back at the medication trolley, but it is lock, I have to get out ask someone for the key and locked it. What the hell, I am getting scolded for nothing. If I leave the medication alone, you will scold me too right. We got this 4 new comers, it is made known to us that we cannot take case, but this girl, keep on taking one case, than never mind, she made so many mistakes, and waste our time to stay back one more hour just to listen to the mistake she have done, IF YOU ARE SO INCOMPETANT, DON'T DO! Don't be so eager to show off when you are not competent enough, HELP TO DO JUNIOR WORK FIRST. Instead, she always stand down there to think of what to write. Break also 12 than go, and she is so ANNOYING. Keep on telling me what to do when I take over, ask me to do this and that, FOR GOODNESS SAKE, I KNOW YOU ARE AN EX EN, ME TOO. Stop showing off, it is really pissing people off. And when she goes in to one patient room, it is so BLOODY LONG, and doing so many redundant actions which really makes me angry. If it is for patient care, I can understand. Sorry, but I think you are too bloody slow and being very inconsiderate and insensitive to all of us, if it you who wana stayed back that's your problem, STOP ASKING SO MUCH QUESTION when we all are rushing to go home as we have something on. Sigh.

Working life

2011-06-11T19:24:00.000-07:00

My working so far so good, and everyday I am so tired that I get back home, eat, do some housework and than I can KO until the next day for my shift. My shift in the ward is morning almost every single day because of the HR request, is good also, because usually the ward is most busy in the morning. So far, all the staff is good except for some, whom are not willing to help us when we are struggling inside. And don't even bother to come in and look at us to ask whether is there any problem. Sigh, another EN also, blamed me for doing something slow. What the hell, please understand why patient relative wants that ok, and why we are the one to be afraid if we are following protocol. I dislike A class, do wrong straight away is us, what the hell?
Anyway HDB results, there is a total of 320 5 room flat units, and bloody hell 2300 plus people is snatching for it. We are number 421? Sigh. What the hell. PLEASE some bloody people if you need the flat because you just sold your flat, that's your problem. Don't waste space down there fighting with us.
Recently I have went to this clinic in Bedok called "Parkway Health", first thing first, your service sucks. Can you imagine the clerk looking at her watch and than saying why the time passed so slow in front of us? And than the X ray counter more candid, you know what he say? He say stop coming la, irritating. Excuse me, we consumers have to pay for YOUR SALARY, stop complaining when I didn't even bloody complain about your service. Than never mind, I was questioning this nurse why are they keep wasting my time and I need to hand in the application ASAP. She talked to me and as I raise my voice, she RAISED her voice too as if I DON'T UNDERSTAND. And more ridiculous is, she walked away when I was talking to her. _|_. Fuck. You know that. Than never mind, the nurse who took my blood, NEVER CHANGED HER GLOVE THROUGHOUT and HAS A HOLE! Than never mind, took my blood, use the syringe and keep pulling my blood out, hello? I am a young person, you don't have to pull it out, it will also flow out! You want my veins to collapse is it? Very bad services! Just because you are handling patient from foreign country doesn't mean that all patients are the same! Please explain! That is the most important part!
Yesterday went to see Joel dear in family engagement programme by the SAF. Can see dear so clearly, he looks so much better in his long hair. I truly missed him man, how long already I didn't get to see him. Daddy should have missed him a lot as we are the last one who leaves. Sigh, I missed him too. Going to church soon.

How's life?

2011-05-31T04:21:00.000-07:00

Joel and me have applied for a Tampines flat and result will be out in June, hopefull can get the house by God's grace. My bond have been deferred and officially starting school in September and darling have been so happy about it and yeah man, I never knew I will be able to come this far and I really had my mum to thank for as she is willing to pay for my school fee.
Joel darling has been coping quite good there though we may have some argument but I think that most important thing is that relationship need to sort out first before getting the problem and also having the problem solved. If you meant for this relationship to last for life, you gotta work for it and don't be lazy. Grace was telling me about triangle relationship, Jesus on top, both me and Joel will be connected to Him and me connecting with Joel. Nothing is too small or big for dearest Jesus, Pastor Prince always say turn to Him, keep turning to Him and you will find grace in Him and see Him supplying you.
My orientation have been so far so good but some colleague in the work place seems to be bad? Not sure, I will have 3 months be with them, hope it will be a good experience. And hoping to apply leave for Joel's bday and welcome back as well =). Today we are rushing in orientation to attend this and that and tomorrow is our IVAM test, calculation need to be good and I shall not worry for our future, He has foresee it all and placing us at the right time with the right people.
How's life my dearest friend, all ganbatte ok? See you guys around. Another chapter end, another chapter begins. Praise the Lord.

Exes

2011-05-16T19:17:00.000-07:00

Recently, all my exes is rushing to congrats me for finding a man better than them. Seriously, you guys can be more lame please. You guys treat girls so bad, I wonder how come you still have girlfriend. And thinking of the things that they have done for their girlfriend made me so angry also, when my birthday, I had nothing except for a bloody cake and than I am happy like siao, now his bloody girlfriend birthday, got a BBQ with so many people. Fuck you. When I asked him, why you don't even put in a relationship, I also forget what he said because he gave me too many lame reasons that I can't even remember. Now he is upset with the girlfriend for not putting their pic together on the FB, pls lei, when you are with me, you are doing the same thing like exactly what that your gf had done. Yeah, lucky thing you know you are not freaking good enough, finding another gf after me within one week is not an awesome thing to do and yes I hate you to the max and I don't wana see you in my entire life, seriously. You irked me to the max. Stop texting or trying to find my number just to "chat" with me because that is freaking lame. Get a life please and I don't wana see any message from you in my FB messages. Your gf hates me? Please ask her not to be so childish, I can't even see her man seriously. Too small to be in my sight. HAHA.

Suppose to go to studio today but Shara didn't manage to grab one studio so end up no need to go liao. Was researching on facial products and I found DR. G, still researching in progress due to toner is going to finish real soon. Am using Biotherm biopur gel wash, seems good, my face is more stable than usual. DR G is also korean product with contributors of a team of doctors, it can be bought from SASA so I am going to research more on it. Today, Been will meet me to pass me my gown and finally I can rest a bit more. =) Joel was chatting with me yesterday, am so happy with the technology that we have today, even so far away, I still can chat with him using eBuddy. I missed him dearly and I knew God has good plan for us for our wedding and etc. Finally, negotiated everything, wedding will be in year 2013.

Simply tired

2011-05-13T18:50:00.000-07:00

Where got time to exercise? Where got time?? So I do skipping everyday. Very tiring ar seriously, and monday got venepuncture assessment. Stress max though, today suppose to go ice skating with Shara they all de but cannot! Mummy ordered the washing machine and steam iron is coming today, so forget it liao lo. Yesterday chatted with Joel =), is like one month without him and I am still coping well maybe is due to work ba I guess and the weather nowadays pls be nice to humans ok? So warm but yesterday I finally had a good sleep and it is not warm at all! I am so contented in life already, what more can I ask for? =) Though sometimes there may be disappointment but nvm, Jesus and Daddy God is my shelter, I always named them Double Blessings from the Heaven! Was watching Fan Fan and Hei Ren wedding, so sweet, Fan Fan was saying something like this to Hei Ren, let me love you even after we die, I will still love you when we are in Heaven. Wonderful! I dislike what other Pastor said like till death do us part. Nope, we are all going to Heaven together, so death won't do us part. Sigh, menses, pls stop your nonsense stomachache and I keep want to go toilet!!! Hais. Tomorrow going to watch Thor with Joel's friend and going Church tml, mummy say wana go out tml le, wonder where she wana go? I think she wana go Ikea buy sofa, AHAH, because Aunty said our sofa so smelly. What the heck, come people house smell people sofa. ZZZ. Can be more lame pls. ARR!

Reflection on Singapore issue.

2011-05-07T17:41:00.001-07:00

Yesterday while watching the election. Watching minister losing their place and people are cheering, I felt really sad I mean how can people be happy when a good minister came down? By looking at education and etc, they are letting in people with broken English to speak after winning the votes on te stage? Omg, so they want people who doesn't even able to give good speech to lead them? Look at all our minister education background and behavior, yes they might be a bit scare this time round is because youngster which include me nowadays, they do things recklessly. They say houses too high, hospital bill too expensive and COE is rising. They don't understand that if everyone bloody own a car, how messy on the road will be? How would you and I go to work on time? Regarding the houses payment, if you stick to a HDB, you would be fine unless you greedy, wanted a condo. While I was checking through the net, this time round 5 room flat of any BTO is ranging from 300,000-350,000 and I have checked according to any previous 3 room flat, is around the same price! But this time round different, our government whom Singaporean are complaining about are helping them in their first bloody payment and as for people who are poor like me are given another 20,000 payment by the government on top of what they have given! And within 30 years, should be able to complete payment of the house because both my mum and Joel dad has already completed their payment, it is rubbish to say it took u 100 years to pay when all the minister and government would have died! Next, they bloody say the healthcare is expensive, seriously what type of people do we have in Singapore! It is just your stupid thinking that health care is expensive! Do you know healthcare is heavily subsidized by your dearest Government? Not many nurses knew it because I used to work in clinic and I am able to know what the government has done for those poor people which include me! Do you know a lot of the patient adding up bills after staying in hospital for few days, are 80% subsidized by government if you are in C class? And a lot of procedure is subsidized by government as well! Few thousands plus procedure and you bloody hell pay 8 dollars only??? It is true when our health of minister said that and those fool took them as a lie! How fucking lie are you guys? Hospitalized before is it? Long before these plan for subsidize by government, people had to pay the whole sum! And singapore policy is treat first, money later! Other country you go, like America or Australia is insurance first treatment later and they charge whole sum! You guys wana complain, check the background what has been done! Stop accusing and accusing and be childish to say because I'm in health care and I'm standing up for healthcare! And Nicole Seah asked PM who paid his salary, who gave him money to give back to us, hello all the extra money yes to pay them but also to help the poor in Singapore and where else do you think those EAGLES award money come from? When else you think those poor money come from to help them? They are quite a fair bit of poor people today, and if government give out to single family about few thousands a year, what do you think 20 families add up to? Some bloody fool more ridiculous asking to stop investing in army products, are you fucking out of your mind? And is a man some more who said this. Singapore so small already yet depend no man but on machine? So man no need to learn fire shooting la, all leave to machine lo? Don't pay the man ma, pay only the machine can already is it? Government has already made grants for more money on army man, last time u suck thumb also 300 hundred per month and tougher training so meaning the male in singapore what? Become fat and lazy ar? Don't spend so much on army??! Than when singapore kena attack, push the man who said no need spend so much go first lo!! Because if what he suggested came true, we will have not any better weapon! As for mocking at Kate spade, look at your girlfriend first guys, before you comment on her. Look at the branded things ur gf wanted, LV, prada, gucci and diamonds. TPL maybe looks bad but who the heck is the one who invade people privacy and leak out her photo? Go and dig out Nicole Seah and some people said when Goh Chok Tong win is TPL wins Nicole Seah, hello is Goh Chok Tong win. But still majority standing with government and I believed people like me which is the poorer group are subsidized by government because I have experienced it a lot of time and even when my mum is warded we pay few dollars only. Thank you PAP for winning and be 100% clean from any law breaking people in your team. I don't know what will happen of opposition take over when they are so childish and reckless. Later like Taiwan, fight physically in meeting. Haha. Education level is important in parliament because yet would mean how much U stand and explain to people, minister from PAP are first class honors from their NUS course, what about people from opposition? Sorry, I am just venting out here and please read it with open mind :)

Foundation Courses!

2011-05-05T05:00:00.000-07:00

Yes, this few days I have been busy with foundation course! And it is pretty interesting and some notes is like WOW enlighten me. HAHA. I wear the uniform with so much stress as well because I scare people will call me if something happen. Alright, I am officially into SIT! OMG! I think Azmi cannot apply liao le, he missed his chances, I think the last saturday was his last chance. And oh man, wasted, so I guess he must applied next year le. Wished him all the best, student once again in September! I will need to ask for bond extension, by hearing what the ADON said, I am more determinded to stay in CGH because there are a lot of thing we need to learn, I am still pretty novice, so I guess when I come out although SN 2, I still need to jia you as I will have lots more to catch up on! So jia you jia you!

Saturday, 30 april

2011-04-29T20:16:00.000-07:00

It is the end of this month! And I have just send over what Joel need in that X. Hope whatever I buy for him, he will appreciate, actually he cherish whatever thing i send to him la, is just that I always misunderstood him.
Yesterday was watching the Prince and Princess marriage, than I read an article, the author said goodbye to everlasting. In that article, it was written that nowadays people don't look for Prince charming anymore, who they look to? Justin Bieber and etc, seriously Justin Bieber or whatever singer there may be, they will not be Prince Charming, I mean come on la, they are either too young, too weird or too proud, they would never ever be Prince Charming. Of course, that article was too extreme in saying good bye to everlasting, there are people eg me, look forward to everlasting. I mean no one would ever want to have a relationship that won't last, simply to say.
Interesting enough, when I read the newspaper today, I read a real life story from a woman who claimed to be an ex model. She said that she was cheated in the relationship and out of pity, she gave her guy a credit card and guess what, it exploded, LOL. She is now in debt of 8k, not only that, that lousy guy asked her for all the presents he gave it to her and even asked her to go to jail for him. This kind of guy, initially should have break up with him please. She even quit her model job because that stupid guy disliked it and had to take care of his child from the ex wife. OMG. Well, love is so blind and that guy is not of handsome to talk of. Sometimes, I also wonder why do women able to accept man of any size and any look, but man fussy about our looks and figure? Think about this again, do you realise that sometimes your man is not perfect but he is asking you to be perfect? Not about me of course, Joel didn't expect me to be this and that, is just that I want to do thing that is good for me. I saw my friend busy dolling herself up just because the boyfriend liked her to be this and that and than in end, she feeling so upset about it. Well, love.
Election is coming, I am not swagger by that Nicole Seah talk seriously. She only seems to talk big and etc, what I am most displease is that they keep on shooting PAP so heartless and likes Kate Spade. What the heck, I bet Nicole Seah also like branded things and etc ma. So making a big fuss out of it, seriously, to think about it, I don't believe in good things will come if opposition wins and you think Govt will listen to their proposal and etc, you may scream and shout in the Parliament, see if they will approve or not, I have never see any opposition proposal or plan win through before. So why do we need to vote for those who can talk but limited action? I don't know, I only my Tampines PAP team have done a very good job, more lift, more shopping centre and also more houses. My PAP here is in charge of housing estate, so I am very sure whom my vote is going for and house is expensive is because of those people who buy property to earn money, not because of the first timer when first timer had a lot of subsidy already and the price they offered for a 5 room flat is my boyfriend's house 3 room flat price many years ago. Yes, they may have flaws and etc, but we don't need a 5 years to suffer from a newbie team. Well, shall stop. =)
Today will be having post PRCP BBQ, hope to have a good weather! Tomorrow will be going to Church alone and than Monday rest, Tuesday officially start orientation. Next Saturday need to vote early in the morning, next monday need to go back NYP collect gown than one week work again and another week is Graduation DAY! AWESOME! Than May and June salary will come in by June, than will be July and than can count down to Joel coming back. Hoping to book a MBS hotel for Joel's birthday, shall smuggle food up to the hotel. Today is Aloysius's birthday as well, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Today will be a fun and happy day! Amen.

Misses.

2011-04-26T05:46:00.000-07:00

I miss you. Is like only 2 weeks past only, haven't reach a month yet. Sigh, hope you are doing well as usually I have you to be with me when nobody at home to accompany me but now I have no one to be with also.
Voting is coming soon, I know which one to vote for already. Old or new, it doesn't matter, I mean what matter most is who works better and if we vote for wrong one, we wouldn't benefit, so you know who I am voting for already?
I am very worried, ever since I have started exercise, I have vaginal bloody discharges, a little bit only with mucus, I search online, they say due to strain and yet I don't have fever, pain, itch and etc. Some say pregnant.. -.-. Well, hope all will went well.
Thursday will be starting BCLS and uniform collecting and next week officially start orientation le, hope all went well and a good place. The first day of work is exactly Jo and me first year anniversary, still remember a year ago, I am still in school man.
Sigh, the weather is making me drunk with water as I drank a lot.

How can't you understand?

2011-04-20T04:20:00.000-07:00

What type of mummy do I have? She thinks Joel earn big buck is it? We told her wedding banquet will be years later, she said ok. Now she is turning around just because my Aunt said so. Seriously it is my wedding and I plan what I want to do, she practically force her way in everything I wana do and I am trying to made her happy. She said Joel and me too much because I always stayed at his house and say her own daughter don't want face which is me. Ok, firstly I really do not agree with her that I am doing something wrong, so we wana get married. Now, she want to force me to have a wedding banquet together as well else people might think that I got baby first than married. Sigh, it is Aunt's daughter have baby and married, IT IS NOT ME. Don't force your way in, we give in by marrying earlier already and than u asked for more! Banquet u pay la, we will go, she selfishly said that I only cared Joel not her, than as my mummy for so long, did you really plan or make anything to make me happy before? Time and again, you pour how many cold water on me? Even on graduation day, you even got the cheek to say CAN I DON'T COME? Sigh. I am very tired, I feel like moving all my things to Joel's house and ignore you forever. I seriously have no respect for you in any area, you gamble, only help brother and forced me to give you money every month and forced me to get married, forced me to have a wedding dinner when we don't even have money at all. You forced your way throughout my life and than always said that I didn't give you money. Why don't you ask brother for money? Since he got money to smoke, drink and pay for prostitute and even had money to gamble, yet me having less than 2k in my bank have to cover all my expenses, bills and etc. He doesn't because you paid for him, how is it fair for me? And do you think if brother were to get marry today, other parents ask how much from him, you think he got money to get married at all? If he is able, confirm is you pay for him every single thing and even say buy a new flat under his name and expect me to pay? What the hell? How is it fair? God, please help me under such a mummy, I seriously can't take it anymore. I felt really hopeless and feel like running away and just get married without her bothering us anymore. Who can really understand? I cannot even tell Joel about this, due to my mummy forcing her way on me, he doesn't respect my mummy too. She is asking for it. Sigh, looking online for cheaper dinner plan. Had to be for halal.

Life have been so good.

2011-04-13T17:29:00.000-07:00

Hello oxygen, carbon dioxide! I don't know who will start to seriously be interested in my blog so yea. LOL. Crap. I have been thru many days without good sleep except for yesterday, I have went through interview for SIT for degree in nursing, I don't know whether will I be elected or not for the first batch of nursing student and again the course will be held in NYP and an exchange programme in year 2 to UK. Darl was saying that I should go and mummy sponsoring me in my studies and Darl for my 2 years expenses. There will be no attachment but long essays to be hand in as my work for marks, so will be using Darl a lot of time just to coach me in english though. Erm, I will be student once again if it is confirm.. So no more money spending and trips anymore till I graduated. Had been in very bad temper towards Joel, I constantly prayed that my temper can be better a little but I guess it takes time. But I will one day.
Went to Sim Lim Square with Jo to buy a new camera for his mission in 2 days time, I think this time round is our fault la, we didn't go specifically to find a small combat camera prices and stuff and all he needed this time round also to have function in video taking with good quality and good battery life and also able to stand heat as Jo country will be quite hot so you know we approach one shop and that Uncle refused to let us go so I told Jo if he don't let us go, we will just argued with him the price so I thought we had a good deal but it wasn't till we went home and search online that the camera is only $399 and we paid $600, devastated, we went back the next day with Jo dad as well to ask about what is going on, were so afraid that the man will deny it and refused but that Uncle ask another man to handle it and we got a better camera and always remembered to check the price online and we got a good camera but at a cheaper price. Still feel cheated though but never mind the Uncle also appeared that he doesn't seems to know the actual price but still YOU SHOULD DO THE WORK by at least checking out.
Went to celebrate Jo and my first year because the official first year will be he is in another country so we went to Kushin-bo at suntec to eat, not really wide variety but if you are Japanese food lover, you might wana go, a bit ex though, 40+ per head, they offered wide variety of tea, drink. Food wise, some sushi, sea food also have, ice cream, dessert was a plus point for me because they have chocolate fondue! OMG. LOL. My marshmellow went missing after I dipped one which is not secure enough and off it went to chocolate world, I'm so sorry. Another plus point is that they will play a song Kushin-bo, than you go queue up for the special food, Jo was running and queuing and I thought what happen, so I see. HAHA. We got strawberry ice, creamy seafood but got one we didn't managed to get it, it is also seafood. So funny, you will see the whole shop moving once the music start.
My days without Jo will be the day I will start to read up more on english, I am thinking of attending English class and also on BCLS so that test in coming April 28, I won't fail the paper, the paper only allow 2 mistake which is like upon 30, you have to get 28 in order to pass. I will be like learning how to draw blood, set plug.
Another thing is that I miss all my friends, hoping that they will be happier now and etc, hoping to see them on graduation day! Have booked online for the graduation cloth and my attendance and once again, no one is attending my graduation because mummy dislike such event and Jo overseas, Jo dad wana come though, shall see how as usually we might wana go celebrate after the event.
Check out!

Fuck off to people who spam my entire chat box

2011-03-27T21:55:00.000-07:00

I had enough of people coming to my website and post weird stuff so I had deleted the entire chat box since nobody has been chatting on it except fuckers.
I had an awesome week with my bf going out to Orchard on Sunday as Saturday I was in Tampines Secondary School for my cadets competition. It was a good ending with both my team getting a Second right after the Champion! Dunman high was crazy to have brought their school flag in our school compound, you guys can be more proud of it till we come up. HAHA. Those kids are always being said by my seniors that they could never made it but hey silly trainers, THEY GOT SECOND. I bet this is the highest achievement for them so far, even EVSS also can't reach that they stood one side and cry and than I saw Sir William posted in FB stating, No use crying over spilled milk. Don't be too arrogant though. Congrats to both team whose hard work has really paid off and Glory to Lord (PS: I prayed really hard).
Orchard sunday, it was not a pleasant one because we argued. But still managed to reach Orchard, not very crowded, so we go through Kinokuniya to browse through some books and to Louis Vuitton to see how much those bags were and we also visited DFS Galleria and guys, please don't be cheated, as I asked how are the bags price varies from outside, they say all the price is the same, they are not cheaper. Oh well, than why the heck are they inside DFS Galleria? I brought Joel to eat the famous Chicken Rice stall there and it costs us like 12 dollars which I felt a bit too ex just because they are famous but still he likes it =). We went to Church after that, on the same day, in the same parking place, we saw 2 Ducati bike, one is yellow and one is red, I always prefer the red one though because to me, the colors are just so amazing bright red, I guess no other bikes can surpass them. Just as Joel review a lot on bikes, Honda is the best throughout the years and I can hear him saying every moment that the Race riders are afraid of Honda because the "not so good" riders riding on it are getting First in the race. Oh well dear, buy Honda than. Than went to Church, it was always the same, awesome service =). Than we went to walk a bit in Marina and settled in Waruku to eat, I think Japanese food in Singapore is still rather safe and oh yeah, I took photo for Japan to ganbatte for them, Jia you Japan, although I still feel that the Donation drive is crazy to ask people for so much money, I always feel that they should wait for them to settle down first before asking money because like in some country, they misused the money, it always had been the case, just take NKF for example and I don't need to elaborate more. Today I am so going to swimming and just be happy, Joel is going to leave me for 3 months soon, I dread that day. Sigh.

I'm bored

2011-03-23T20:25:00.000-07:00

Ok, get my attachment results back. I am not hoping for A due to my CI is really strict but thank God, I got an A for my PRCP. That's good to know and I can officially apply University of Manchester but still there are limited places so I am not hoping much for it but still placing the hope in Daddy Lord instead :).
Have been exercising with Joel and with myself these few weeks by swimming, jogging and climbing up stairs, I have realized that my legs have become stronger, if only there is any ways I can do to train my arm as well. But it wasn't very easy to climb the stairs 6 rounds as I huff and puff throughout but still there's still contentment in doing it, so even if Joel is not here, I will still continue to do it for a healthier me.
Am so annoyed with the updating of the thing online for the University, hope they really bucked up for their slow system which almost make me mad. Today they called me again saying still incomplete, freaking annoyed man seriously.
Today gotta go teach home nursing, those girls that I am teaching now are really good leathers and I really hope they can do their best for the corp and do the school proud once again! Junyang is coming back, confirm gonna get ear whacking from him lol.

Life is beautiful

2011-03-02T19:11:00.000-08:00

My life now is slow and relax, enjoying every single moment that I have, reading up, exercising, waiting for dear =), and playing the games that he downloaded. Have been such a long time didn't watch tv, so now watching a lot, lol. Than download movie as well to watch, because IT IS HOLIDAY! HEHE.

Life's a long journey

2011-03-01T18:03:00.001-08:00

Well, just finished the long and scary PRCP that I have. I dislike the sister when we wana give thanks, she just walked off which is very rude, nevermind for the fact that I know that you are old soon enough to be retired so I guess I won't see you for very long. Glad to know such childish Sister as it was her own FAULT for not letting PRCP student to take case and serve ya right because you have to make SNE to come and find you to talk about what went wrong and having ADON to press you down to let us take case. THIS IS LAME, hope you have wake up your freaking idea for the next PRCP student, don't ever think that we keep quiet means we accept it for so long one day we are there, we will fight, and I will prayed that your ward will no longer be NYP purchased ward, because you just freaking waste our school fee in such a lousy ward with some lousy staff whom is non-receptive to feed back and being very childish by revenging on us and scolding us pig, look at yourself, you are a muslim yourself yet pig is coming out from your mouth here and there to insult every malays in our group. Disgusted, if I come back, I come back strong, stop your freaking childish acts, matured Adults =D.

Joel is post pone for his mission trip in March and now he is going in April, kind of sad because my upcoming trip he is not able to go as I hope he would go but due to his everchanging schedule I think it is not a good idea to go anyway. Thank God for post-poning the mission trip so that I can accompany him longer and than he will be back in August. Hopefully we can celebrate together when he gets back home and we are assured by his army in charge that he will be fine though not 100% but still it sets my mind at ease. I am very excited for the upcoming trip though, looking at Cleona's plan, I am really excited for it, so I think I will buy a lot of stuff or very little? I also not very sure, hehe, but for sure, hoping to buy Joel something back. I am so glad that Hwee Been is being accepted into poly and as I met her yesterday, her anxiety level is very high, LOL. Relax girl, you gonna make it, don't worry. If Hwee Been is studying and Joel is away, I am very happy, because I will always have a friend there for me if I need someone =) not as in saying my other friend not because Been stays very near me. Am not excited for work and I am intending to apply Degree course. God blessed me, I hope I can have a good plan by God in my upcoming life. I love you, Jesus.

Been exercising for upcoming trip as well. =)

Blog post

2011-02-21T01:06:00.000-08:00

I had no particular word in my head for the title so I put blog post instead. LOL. Joel came back from America already, the next boring time I had will be in April as he will be deployed for some mission. Am happy today, although some EN in the ward is damn bad, refuse to tell me anything wrong with the patient especially when I am doing in charge, be nice ok? We didn't even complain you to management. Well, here goes the story of complain start, CI saw some of the EN bullied us and decided to let us speak to the management to settle some stuff or to pour out our unhappiness and in fact she asked for names so that she can take some action so we only pour out 3 names~ JUST 3~ In the end, they go tell the ward saying all EN because they don't want those who are being said to feel bad and in the end, the whole ward EN treated us like enemy. Sigh. Alright end of story, was being tortured for a few days though. Now things are getting better. Thank you Jesus~ Few more days to end of PRCP, FINALLY. TML can get to know the result man, o me gosh!~ =) I knew it will be good. HEHe.

Gong Hei Gong Hei

2011-02-03T15:56:00.000-08:00

HAPPY CHINESE TO ALL MY FRIENDS! This year although not many wishes from my friend but I think is ok, only a few precious one is more important than many fake wishes. This time round, I also took time to think and type to my friend. Really hope that all of them will be blessed in their life.
Yesterday got a call from Darling while was on the way to fetch Auntie Doreen (Joel's aunt), was so happy to receive his call and I think Uncle missed Joel, so passed him the phone and Joel was in negative seven temperature in the forest. Really hope that he is not freezing cold, he asked if I could say I love you but I was in the cab, didn't managed to say it due to so many people not talking and so quiet =(, but I texted him anyway. Saw Joel's cousin, Wilfred, who is working as a cook, so particular about food. LOL. Anyway went to Auntie ? house, we ate popiah and laksa and is her specialty so we ate heartily and I am so full. Than we sat there for a while, than I TELL YOU JOEL'S RELATIVE IS DAMN HUGE! I get confused here and there! But I get a lot of ang pao, keke....!!!! Than after that went to Auntie Karen house I think. Than watched movie and eat eat eat all day long. I used to enjoyed myself when new year because it is all my cousin gathering there! But I can't see them anymore due to mummy dislike. But nevertheless, Joel's relative all are very friendly and extremely fun to be with. They keep on calling Faith here and there until I blur. LOL. Ate too much though. =( Sigh. Time to really exercise SOON. And also today I am invited to their lunch and dinner. Sigh, suddenly my stomach open le, I prayed to God my stomach can take all the good food today coz got sashimi. LOL.

Believe.

2011-02-02T03:39:00.000-08:00

Have you ever like feel that the guy beside you isn't the man that you wanted to be with? Like when you found the right one, some how or rather, your heart will sort of hint you whether did you find the right one in your life. For christian, is eternal, life time partner. The right one will makes you comfortable, always let you win in argument, buy you things to make you happy, do a lot of thing just not to let you go. If you find the right one, probably have a little more faith in believing that he does really wants to be with you and trust in him that he won't do anything wrong or unfaithful towards you. I guess that's the most important one and also not forgetting that he will also think of your friends and your family.

Cheers Joel, tomorrow will be our 9th month in being together, I know is not very long but I do know that you're the right one. I love you =). Although you are somewhere in America now and I do really miss you but thanks to Jesus, I am not sad after all but is my mum making me freaking upset abt it now. Sigh.

3 more weeks to go!

2011-01-31T15:15:00.000-08:00

3 more weeks to pass PRCP but also 3 more weeks, my bf will leave me for 3 months. Sigh, is it a good or bad thing? Ward is still as disgusting as ever when we can only prayed and hoped that we have a SSN in our team so that we can take case, fucked up EN only make use of us to do their dirty job and they don't even wana do it. Freaking sister though for making our life so damn hard! How to become a efficient nurse I really wonder. Dear is not sending me anymore message le as he is in out field and the last message to me was so short =(. Sigh. My passport initially also gave Ru problem, that's suck. My mum also scolded me for being heartless, oh man, I really wished to break any bond with you sometimes. Raining for so many days and congratulations, I think my asthma is back and I need to see a DR sometime soon. Dear friend also plan so many stuff for him when he come back, and I don't see a need for me to be with him at all because all his friend kinda plan for him and forgetting me and when I saw the tag, I'm like???? Why am I not invited or they planning for a boys meet up or get together but I also want to acc my bf before he leave for 3 months and I really hope he have some time for me as he always even we 2 are together, he always get his friend comes along and I totally don't have time for him le. Sigh, time is running out dude.
But nevertheless, life is still beautiful, I shall not let such set down to bring me down. Finally booked a trip with Alina, Cleona and My myself =). Prayed that nothing will come up and we all will go and back smoothly in the name of Jesus I prayed. Amen. New year mood, no mood for work man, who's with me =)

The most crap shit I had ever heard

2011-01-22T20:34:00.000-08:00

You know what? My ward sister is a SHITHEAD. She don't allow us to take case, which sadly I only managed to take case of 4 successfully, the next day just cause of a lame reason she don't allow us to take case and just said that to write in our hand and keep it inside pocket and don't let us write in the file which is fucking crap~ My gosh, than why do we even need to come out for posting since you said that JCI is coming? Might as well cancel our whole attachment la, we are not year 1 to 3, for goodness sake, we came out for PRCP! Wake up your idea ok~ It is getting irritating as days goes by.

Oh Hey!

2011-01-11T16:41:00.001-08:00

Good morning! IT is a good morning with my day off today! Going for gym later! Had such a busy day as yesterday after work, straight go to lawyer firm there to register my name as Faith. So from onwards, my name is Faith. =D. People always got the misconception that you must be baptized than you can have a Christian name. Nope, it is not true, God loved me first that's why even some of them haven't become Christian yet but their calling to them is so strong that they even misunderstood it. I had this name came to me really long time ago is like when Im 17 or 18? Now I'm 24, so it had been a good 7 to 8 years? I liked it so much, I give it up to another person and named her, but however, she didn't use the name at all, so Joel was just telling me why don't I use it instead? Not exactly that he named me, is just that we both felt that this name is calling out to me. But however it is, my name is Faith. A new name, A really new beginning in new year =).

Stupid Cleaner.
I really had no hatred to any cleaner or is referring to anyone out there reading. As usual, I all set out to work for a busy tuesday, I wanted to turn patient, so prepared the changing trolley, I went out to take a black trash bag as the changing trolley is different and doesn't have any support from below so white bags would be seemed as useless as it is too thin. This fucking cleaner from the back shouted HEY HEY, take from inside the drawer, ok, I take. She said, WHAT YOU USE IT FOR? I said for changing, she say use white one, I told her Staff taught us to use black, than she SHOUTED WHICH STAFF WHICH STAFF, ok than I say her in her face, YOU ONLY SCOLD STUDENT, yea she is! Than she SHOUTED, KAREN TEACH YOU LIKE THIS? USE THIS BAG? TEACH U LIKE THIS? FUCK OFF la CB. Use CI threaten us? Who the fuck are you man? Of course I am angry la, you insult student, despise student, we all come out, you also nothing! Not that I don't respect her you see, it is she making the working environment suck! Everytime when she is mopping the floor, she saw student standing there, she scold us GO AWAY LA, CAN'T YOU SEE I AM CLEANING HERE? Than just nice one staff walked past, she kept quiet, anyway, I have complained YOU to CI. Than in front of CI, she kept quiet, just nice know, she was mopping the floor, than saw CI came in, she scared. SHIT la, than don't use Karen to threaten us. God blessed you man, do on better things, you are no one to look down on us. God Bless!

Ok, nothing more.

Threatened

2011-01-02T20:22:00.000-08:00

Hello! Happy 2011!! I prayed that this year will be a good year for everyone =). Why I put threaten as my title? I will tell u now.

Last few days before new year, we were very busy doing our ward stuff, CI came and talk to us. She was explaining what she think is right and keep on catching us for nonsense, first my SN was so busy that she couldn't stand beside me and serve drug with me, than CI came and stand beside me and said that I am a dangerous nurse but is the SN walked away from me and I was being wronged for nothing and than CI added like why everytime I catch you guys is when you guys are doing wrong things? I couldn't understand that CI, people are busy, you are a SN before, you don't know is it? I already tried to stand beside the SN till she walked away, is not my fault ok. Second incident, she asked Pauline to come and asked me to go over so that she can say her own story and "teach" us stuff, it seems to her that everything can be read up instead of personal experience or face to face experience to the things that we need to do or ought to know, but we are stil very raw, she says that we must know the peak and duration of drugs, I remembered when I asked her a drug before but she don't know and she said that we are not a safe nurse, just because we don't know the peak and duration. WTF, you don't remember every drug will you? That is pharmacologist job, my gosh, than she bring out her file and said "I already have potential failure on my hand, you see the list", WTH, threatening us? But we are doing good, she keep on complaining to us about ward CI is not there and stuff, saying they should put another CI there to help us, than go complain to CGH, don't come and grumble just because you guys are incapable of making student to learn up to their best ability because I really believes that our batch of girls are the best of the best and we are very willing to learn. When she asked us a question, I just told her my answer, she even rolled her eyes because she thinks that is wrong, hello my answer is just 1 hour away from the exact answer ok? Do you even need to row your eyes? She is not encouraging at all! All students need now is understanding and understanding! We already so tired and stressed up, mind you. Just because you think we guys are so capable, that's why you forced us more and more? Hai. I will complain this CI, seriously can't stand her.

Next, this fucking doctor. Before I start this grievances, I had to say that not all doctors are bad, only some. I always feel that without nurses, doctor are really nothing. And CGH is crazy, they made 1 SN to take charge of 16 patients in C class ward. I was helping my SN to take blood pressure for a MRSA patient and he had a PICC line on him, so I saw this doctor coming in, thinking that he could help me set plug for my patient as he is hypotensive, so I called STAFF NURSE, not doctor, and ask her whether can he set plug for my patient. Upon hearing this, DOCTOR shouted at me till the whole ward can hear, saying WHAT YOU TALKING, THIS PATIENT HAVE PICC LINE, till all turned and looked at me, so I shouted at him back saying NOT THIS PATIENT! FUCK YOU!(Of course I didn't say FU, inside my heart only) That point of time, I feel like pointing middle finger in his face, he is just a fucking house officer! Even if he becomes Consultant, I don't even care a shit about him! I think that some Consultant also suck, they complain can go to Sister, than our complain lei? Go where? Shitty Doc(Dog) sometimes. You want respect, earn it yourself, so far none of the doctors I see really makes me respect them.

Anyway, Happy New Year to all, PRCP ending soon!

PRCP

2010-12-14T04:14:00.000-08:00

PRCP is crazy, I must admit, but there are many many good staff which I have irritated in helping me in report. I have passed one report and write one report and that patient is totally under my care and I kind of felt scare because the SN don't even touched my file. I am so lucky the case that I am taking is light one, super light. I realise also passing report is not only passed your shift, if they asked you question, you gotta flip back to the previous plan to talk about the case if they asked. So ya thank God, I have got a gd SN, but what I dislike is, people are asking me like whether if I have take case, I mean this is personal space, I think I can take it already that's why I take one case. And some childish people actually spread about it and I am truly surprise that people are asking and than they asked CI if they can take case as well, I mean why compare? Go slow, observe, and be at your own pace. I truly scare of rumours, I must admit. I am not gd yet but I will learn, pardon my mistake, I do fall, not everything I will be correct so don't expect that. CI told me in my face that she is disappointed in me, Well, is ok.
Sorry to Ru, because of the Xmas celeb thing as well. I messed up the dates. Hope everything well.
Lastly, I am stressed, I scare I can't meet Karen expectation of me, I scare to lose my friends. And mostly importantly, I scare to fail this attachment, May God almighty blesses all of us. In Jesus name, I prayed, Amen.

No point being self pity

2010-12-02T04:45:00.000-08:00

It is just me right? Raining sure does makes people moody. In the middle of the few minutes I get to see Joel, he was being called back to army for some important stuff. I was totally upset and was being said to behave myself by his mum. Ok, I am angry, seriously what is called behaving myself when I did nothing wrong? I just lie down there only. I am trying to control for so long I can and I prayed to be able to handle it ok. Please stop calling me plastic, because I am a human with blood, I am sorry but I am very angry as I have been bottling up.
I am really disgusted by some ITE friends of mine, can I delete them from my fb? They are completely ignoring me when I asked them some thing on their fb yet they can reply another person, I mean come on la, you replied to your other friend as well on fb, don't tell me you didn't see mine? What the heck? In what way are we called friends? Might as well I delete you because I don't see you as my friend. And for those who are my friend, please stop saying I have treated Syarizal(My Ex) badly, if you are on his side and blindly without knowing anything stand by him, by all means, don't have to tell or show me anything that you support him because no matter what, I am the person who have been with him for 2 freaking years and I know him too well and stop telling me that he is nice or what so ever reason you can tell me about him because I almost puke when I heard it. I hope some of them will understand the fact that I am not happy with people telling me that he's nice, why I don't want him. Please ask him to reflect his own fucking personality and flirtatious~ Let's come back to friends. I know that sometimes I am a bad friend, but not all the time I am BAD. There are times that I am good, all my ITE friends only remember the time when I am bad, even got this girl I sms her, she replied me back whether do I know how to spell hypocrite? She is saying that I am a hypocrite where she hear from some one that I say about her and than she didn't even bother to tell me anything and than I called her up and than she said someone told her that I say ber behind. I mean, even if I were to say, I won't say things that actually hurt you, that person whom I know who said to her, is another faker, she is good at adding oil and fire to the situation. Than so be it, what a waste of year I have spend in ITE knowing such fuckers that wouldn't even last for long. Some friends they know that I am like that, but they cannot accept me for being loud, exclaim very loud if I saw something weird or like really WOW. Than say that I am proud for showing off and that's hurtful, than you blog it out I will feel good is it? A lot of time is friends don't say and as if I must know, and plus that is the first mistake I have done towards him and I am not getting any forgiveness from them at all and than I was being outcasted by another fucker who spread rumours about me and than cry, than all stand by her. _|_ In that case, meaning if next time were to such thing happens again, should I CRY too so that I can gain some pity and all my friends back? NVM. I decided to delete them for good, I felt really upset when my birthday I didn't even hear anything from them and still dare to ask tips from me when practical test. Forget it, take it that I don't even know you guys at all in the first place. I was really hurt when that time my birthday, it was my 21st, they didn't even bothered to wish me and then my bday present, they still can ask for money back. Stop acting as if you guys are really happy in seeing me, seriously I don't think I am your friend at all.
Come to think again, I think some of my actual friends now also think that I am not a very good friend ba, this is what I feel. I hopefully wish that from now onwards, I try to help my friends as much as possible so that I won't regret. Perhaps it is really me who treated my friends wrongly, but aren't suppose good friends of yours to tell you where have you gone wrong?.. ='( Friends...

Feeling happy!

2010-11-29T01:22:00.000-08:00

Was feeling damn happy. Hehe. Went to TM walk around to look for clothes and pants. I rarely had pants, so gotta buy and top up as most of my pants, so paiseh when going up on Joel bike, my pants tore. =(. Malu, even if testing bike with him also, pants burst open, what the heck. I bought 6 clothes (which include dresses), 2 pants and one bag which total up to 100 dollars, was feeling happy as I long time haven't go shopping le. I was given discount for the bags too, and I definitely will go back there to buy the clothes again =). The clothes is only 10 per piece, finally can shop le and for me is also de stress. Later, going to watch Rapunzel movie with Joel at 9pm, am pretty excited about it, because I saw the trailer, it is so cute. I like Rapunzel and Cinderella a lot, is like they are the princesses being locked up or being forced to do something that they disliked. But anyway, I am very happy now. HEHE.

Tight.

2010-11-28T20:23:00.000-08:00

My recent meeting up have been very tight. I missed Naveen's cutting cake session. It would have been so good if I am there to witness but I missed it. Went for Church on Sunday, Pastor Prince reminded us that God forgive us ALL sins, not one or two but ALL. It is important for Christians to know the correct teaching and I really agree with him, with the right beliefs, our behaviors and thinking will slowly change to become a better person. I am very tired now and I really don't know what can I typed here.

Anyway, Happy earliest birthday to Fatimatusshara, the longest name I have ever met in my life, and the most patient lady in the world I would say. I will be having PRCP with her and I really appreciate the first day, I was given Shara, for the rest of my whole NYP years, I came to school with her and went back sometimes together and it is because Shara has her dad to send her to school or Rizuwan(her faithful fiance). She is the type of person whom you wana angry but just can't bring yourself to angry about. I admit I am very chatty, only she can tahan me and I know why, coz Rizuwan also like that. LOL. But seeing birthday, the things we know is that we will aged some how or rather, the thing is to cherish everything around us and especially friends or even loves one. I don't know when and how I can get to meet the deceased one of my loves one but I do hope that they are in peace. I really scare to lose any of my friends and I really hope all of them will be in great place with great people any time of their life and also not forgeting to find me and meet me. I know sometimes I had to leave early, but I have no choice in order to accomodate both me and Joel, I really do wish I have more time with both side as both are my friends as well. Jia you everyone, it is one more week for our PRCP.

Sad.

2010-11-26T03:24:00.001-08:00

I am just so disappointed. Just so.

Sigh!

2010-11-21T17:22:00.000-08:00

May I know how old am I to receive stupig nagging from you? May I know which rule in the whole wide world stated that ONLY FEMALE must do housework? Why is that lazy pig still lying in his bed and wait for you to do his laundry? Why is that asshole doesn't have to clean the smelly toilet after he used and that I have to wash it so that I can tahan going in? Why is it you as a MOTHER, you are not TRYING to help him? And pushing blame on me saying I must be the one who teach him? If I can make him listen to me, I wouldn't even be headache about it? And who is the one who let him smoke inside toilet? WHO? You keep on saying I must sweep the floor, I have already need to wash all clothings, smelly one plus yours and HIS, you know I hate to wash his clothing because he doesn't deserve for us to help him yet you yourself find so many excuses to help HIM! Than THAT IS YOUR PROBLEM! If he doesn't appreciate the breakfast you bought for him and complaining everytime he doesn't eat, THAN DON'T BUY! Don't come and complain to me about your WONDERFUL SON! You made me gave you money and said I didn't give enough, IS BECAUSE YOUR USELESS SON ain't giving you any! I only have 950, how much you want? I no need to eat, use outside is it? He can totally spend it on his cigarette, prostitute and ETC. While me save and save, can't even go overseas, what the heck are you thinking! I really don't wish to hate you and than blame you, BUT ALL I ASK FOR IS TO BE FAIR! You gave him a room in the house, you gave him fan while we are burning hot in the living room. I really don't know what kind of mentality is in your brain thinking that if you help him like this, it would work! HELP HIM? Help me instead la. I don't know, I just think that if I ever get married, I would run away and never come back to help this family at all! Why in the first place you guys deserve any, maybe I am heartless, but my heart don't like it because all of what you guys did. You say brother was being bullied when he was young, AM I NOT! You protected him more than you protect me than say because no one helped him! THAN DID YOU EVER HELP ME WHEN I NEED YOU THE MOST! He can't walk out of it? BULLSHIT! If you would have shut your mouth, it would have been so much better! It is not that I don't cherish you or what so ever! It is you who always pour cold water on me, whenever I said I wana do something, what is the first thing you said? You said to me whether can I really do it or not, than I ask you for money, you angry and shout at me! Than you asked me for money, I must give is it? Hello, every single cent outside is my own money, YOU GAVE ME NONE when I am studying! YOU GAVE HIM MONEY EVEN WHEN HE IS WORKING, what the hell? I really don't know what type of mum do I have? You should have really kill me when I wana commit suicide then, because I rather not be with you. I'm sorry.

Happy! :)

2010-11-20T07:01:00.000-08:00

Today is a tiring day seriously, went to swim early in the morning, got tan a bit but got a lot of people but I stayed in the pool for like one hour and Joel with his friend went to gym. Lucky me, swim finish bath le than rain. It was quite heavy but after a while no more le. Than went to eat with Naveen. Than Joel went for his CPR course, it was way awesome, he can pass anyone because he is officially an CPR instructor now! He leave for his BB camp after which while me at home sleeping plus doing my pharmacology notes. Naveen called me 5 times but I'm sleeping la. Than went to bath, came out saw Joel on my bed :D, I thought he was in camp but he came and gave me surprise! He also need to buy Milo for the cadets so there he is! Felt so happy ;D. So now I am writing notes and gotta read later. Jia you!

Today again

2010-11-19T00:09:00.001-08:00

Yes, people let's celebrate! Coz we gotta live another day!! YAY! Today went jogging again, wasn't sure how long I run, but I am sure that I run for around 20 minutes, came back face red again. Now I know why people keep on staring at me there, it is prob that my face is damn red. Came home wash my running attire because it is damn smelly for goodness sake that I have to wash it. My shoe are not exactly dried from yesterday washing so yes, I jog with my smelly shoe. HAHA. Gotta really buy a pair of black sport shoe soon for PRCP, else I will suffer from leg pain for the 3 months. I really prayed that I have breaks before working life start, but even if I started working early, I would be happy too because earlier start, earlier clearing of bond and have income but the thing is that I can't go overseas with Min they all le, that's a sad point to add in. But other wise, I would want to meet them soon! Or I tried to pester them on some occasional days to eat =D. Next year, is a torture year to me as Joel will be away for mission but lucky me, I have got work so that my days will passed faster or at least I hope. I want to get a good ward not as in you know, good ward as in good patient, you know that patient will never be good unless they are not sick! LOL. Ok, my good is referring to good staff and sister, it is very important to work for sister who are non-blaming type not like WD 44 sister, she really is a blamer and not willing to listen to Staff problem and keep on saying they have let her down and discouraging word, I mean come on la, you never work before ar? Crazy shit. Everytime when it reaches Sunday, I felt hopeful again, maybe it is because I went to Church, Pastor Prince always said that Holy communion is impt because it helps us to connect with God or protect us from falling sick, I am so going to do that soon and not forgetting to know more about Jesus. I have owed Wen Qi 5 bucks and Ru 37 bucks, will return Ru first as I am going to see her soon. ENJOYEDDDDDDD.

Pre PRCP

2010-11-19T00:00:00.000-08:00

Ever since I have seen my prcp schedule, I am thinking how to deal with the nervousness plus the characteristic of my ward staff. I am scare, full of worries, the ward that I am posted to, the staff told us that they are not paid to teach us, is our CI paid to teach us, Sister screaming at every possible student that handle her patient, fall rate high in the ward. Hai, is a no no for this ward and that I am posted to WD 44, yes to those who are in CGH, it is a bad bad ward. Some staff are good, some are not, with a lot of student number I have never seen before, I have some night duties, I have a lot of sat shift but lucky Christmas is off for student, suddenly a YAY that we are student. Schedule shift is crazy, I think I have no time to rest, afternoon shift follow by morning, afternoon, afternoon than morning again. F max. But is ok, I prayed hard to God for grace. Amen.

Yesterday

2010-11-18T00:41:00.001-08:00

It was a holiday yesterday, supposingly to go swimming with Ru, but was cancelled due to me doing last min thing. And what was so lucky was that my menses came in the midnight. Hai, no wonder was so emo this few days. Joel daddy created a small tiny table for me in Joel's room, was rather happy about it as I have my own cupboard and small dressing table that I can finally put my own stuff as Joel is a guy, all his things are messed up, LOL. At midnight went to Jalan Kayu to eat roti prata, it tastes good and it was really fresh and taste sweet. Is there any secret in making roti prata, I really wonder. We slept at 4am, woke up at 10, went to gym in the afternoon, met Joel's friend and Been, and exercise, but I couldn't exercise that much as was feeling uncomfortable but manaaged to lose 200 calories. Than after which, ate a little and rest and meet up with his friends and that marks the end of the day. Today this morning, went to jog for half an hour, way awesome, but I think I got burnt man, having a mp3 with you is something seriously good you know, you just have to put in 6 songs, after 6 songs, you can rest le, 30 minutes just nice. Saw a lot of Ah ma, ah gong age one, LOL, I guess I am the youngest there in the park, I was quite afraid of jogging in the park as recently there's quite a number of news reporting that ladies jog themselves get raped and was murdered, or even walking alone there also get raped, but there's always a lot of people there so I don't have to worry about it. Came home with a super hungry stomach, but I do house work first, wash clothes and my super smelly sport shoe, lol. Was thinking of giving away my sport shoe and change for a better one as there is this sport shoes campaign, you gave them your shoes, they give you 50 dollar discount to buy buy anything in the shop, I needed a black sport shoe so that it can last me in PRCP as I realised sport shoes help me to stand better in PRCP as you know we can't sit. Thinking of can't sit in attachment, I think is crap, I think is Wang Min tell me about it that their CI don't let them sit, I mean what the hell? Are we not human?? Sit for a while also cannot meh, so what we are young? F it man, my leg always become super aching when I get home le. Shut up with all the nonsense instruction pls CI. Stand in OUR SHOE FOR ONCE! Alright. HAHA. Grumbling, anyway, PRCP I have sat shift, sleeping day, night shift and I seriously think that the Doris Chan sucks to the max, you know midnight shift, she put what time, 9-7.30, HOW I KNOW IS WHAT TIME! Can't you put universal time? I was like thinking what is SD, than I realize is sleeping day, I mean come on la, i thought is 9am to 7.30pm le. Where got people set schedule like that one. Anyway, afternoon shift prolonged to half an hour more. Sian max. =( But we got PHIL in our schedule also don't know what the hell is that, anyway, same ward as Shara, same ward as we left. But I think is better because we know CI Karen, so I think yup, we will have a good time there. Anyway, settled SJAB bed loan and gonna meet my cadet later. Bored max. Sleep for 4 hours I think, now super awake, wana watch Due date with Joel and also Harry potter, I think Harry potter gotta wait for like 1 more week. Can predict a lot of people watching. Argh. HEHE. Was thinking of going to eat at M'sia this sunday with Joel. Hope can go la. HEHE.

Oxygen Vitc C Lotion

2010-11-15T21:50:00.000-08:00

This product here is really awesome. Why? It contains oxygen and vitamin C to help your face detox as well. Your skin needs oxygen so that it can renew and vitamin C in the ingredient is a plus point. Initially the lotion was just oxygen, with just the oxygen, your skin becomes softer. I have not much of pimple problem anymore, scar and those pores which have dropped out leaves no more hole after the white or black heads have been dropped out accidentally. You might want to try the whole range of them in an affordable price or even cheaper in Korea itself.

Pro about the product
1) Affordable
2) Visible result that can be feel and observe
3) Tone your skin color, so if you have discoloration on your face, you might want to try
4) Fresh light lemon smell

Cons about the product
1) It is heavy and it is made of glass bottle I think so, I haven't try to break it yet. Prayed hard it won't break.

So far I think is that. Enjoy.

Instinct.

2010-11-14T16:54:00.000-08:00

Is woman instinct that accurate? Than how come all the ladies that I know can tell whether did their husband cheated on them? Is it instinct or observation? Well, maybe both? I think God created us in a way that we both complement each other, you can see it very obviously when both are in relationship. But the thing is everyone keep on saying finding the right man in your life, but what is the meaning of right man? Handsome, rich but treat you like dirt? Or average looking but hard working and treasures you? In life, it is always opposite, you can only find perfect man in the drama which is fantasize by the director themselves but maybe some of the actors shit like hell. But when on the wedding day, woman definitely knows whether what kind of man she is marrying and than if you find peace on your wedding day in your heart, it means that you have find a right man, but if you hesitated, please do not proceed with the wedding man. A lot of time, when I sit behind Joel, the word that he says or the things that he do although it seems little but I know that he is the guy that I wana be for life.

Yesterday
Yesterday was a very busy day, I can sleep for hours man! Early in the morning, Joel and his dad brings me to Changi to have dim sum for breakfast,it was way awesome meal I ever had, filling like mad and than his daddy keep putting the food infront of me rather Joel, felt contented in a way because I knew that his daddy accepts me. Than came a bike gang, LOL, yes you can see Joel eyes popping out as he is thinking of getting a new bike next year, the bike range are his favorite when one of the Ducati Coarse bike came in, 2 BMW bike, 1 more Ducati, 1 of the bike I never see before but I was guessing maybe it is triumph, 2 more came in but I don't know what bike is that. It was like we are in a bike show room, the bike was huge, and when the bike gang came in, all turned towards their direction. LOL. So admired for like one hour, returned to his house, went to gym, we are in there for 3 hours, I lose 400 calories, than rush to Church, Church was awesome, it was a Pastor from Australia who came in before we step into New Creation Church, he shared with us that our God is like the eagle in the sky who will protect us because we are his children and he reminds that man of the family should actively defend the family no matter what happen or even death. True, some man in Singapore really lacks courage. But it was a rather short session, than I went to the Church shop and I saw Christmas sales, so went to have a look and realise they are selling the picture Bible only selling it for 13 dollars, so I bought it, I am not the type who can see the normal book, I will sleep. So picture will help, and we rushed to Naveen house for Deepavali celebration. It was drizzling, but thank God, it was a safe journey. We reached, we eat and played games together. Suddenly, I really wanted to a Wii.. =(. Although the action are stupid but it is really fun to play with friends!

PS: It is the slashing season, I really prayed that my friends and families would not get involved and becomes the victim of the slashing.

Nice day spend yesterday

2010-11-11T19:28:00.000-08:00

Yesterday went to rush to Macpherson to teach home nursing, I would say those cadets are not interested at all. I would not teach anything home nursing to other Corp anymore even if they paid me to do so. If your people not interested, don't waste my time. Than went to City hall, meet Shaakirah, Fara, Xin Yi, Pauline, Wen Qi to play bowling first. Erm, although I am the last one but well is fun and I thought my finger almost gone because the next lane guy their balls are really heavy. Than after that went to watch movie with them, this time round have Rinee, Due Date is the movie that we watched. Awesome stuff with lots of crap and you jolly well prayed you won't meet such a friend like him. Than after that we went to bugis, I don't know what is the name of the restaurant but it WAAYYY DAMMMMNNN AWESOME, my gosh, of course they will need to check your IC, because they sell this see sa? I don't know how to spell it, but is like something u smoke through water, I tried once and than then twice but I disliked the taste though so I don't do it already, I tried the Arabian food and drink, almost fainted although is chef choice, but way no no, the drink of mine don't know called what also, but our food came first, I don't know why the malays food CAME SOOOOOOO LONG, we almost eat finish le, theirs than just arrived, can you believe it? Well. They never complain so is ok la, than when I meet Joel, he said that see sa is more high in nicotine compared to cigarette, my gosh! I thought it was way better than cigarette, suddenly I felt that my lungs is highlighted black in color, but well one or two puff and than I won't see it anymore, but the menu wasn't that fantastic. Don't go, most people go is because of see sa. Well, enjoyed myself and have a good night sleep with my wet hair, was too drowsy. haha. Nashiha joined us later and they wana go cycling next week. Oh no. I hate cycling due to night cycling, it tramatized my butt badly and leg. I AM SO SCARE. LOL. Don't spend your holiday hpppily, it will pass damn fast. Pass it miserably, it will go slower.

Random Thoughts

2010-11-09T16:14:00.001-08:00

Sometimes some people just pissed me off with their attitude. People tell u nicely just shut the mouth up and listen la. I don't like it when some people always fight back. Isn't it obvious that something are not suppose to say and than you go AROUND telling people of something we don't know yet than still say different people different thinking? What the heck. They wants them to get prepared instead of us meh? Seriously I don't wana comment on those people anymore. Like shit. They messed up my wonderful day!
Some people also, why always care about the comment from others? Isn't it what you think and what you do is better? You mean you are not big enough to make decision? Making yourself look so cheap for what? In that way, you think you will get a real life time partner? Seriously NO. OMG. Grow up. I am just angry that why girls or ladies must behave so cheaply so that you can sell yourself like in a wet market people shouting for a price of you, if your boss happy they even reduced the amount that you actually are!
Looking at newspaper! Those gang, what the heck you think you are doing? Slashing and hacking people are damn SHIOK is it? What about we tied you up and slash at u? Eat too much nothing better to do?
I hate home nursing! Those junior don't even know how to call and check up on their lecturer! F MAX! Wake up your idea before I whack all of you and even put my rank wrongly!

ARGGHHH!!! What is wrong with me? Im getting so angry nowadays! Is it because of my menses?

THis is not not true right?

2010-11-09T00:45:00.000-08:00

I have a dancing friend for so long and I know most of the dancer are gay.. I always thought that he and her will be a fairy tale as they are 5 years old and almost getting engaged this year end. After his NS, little did I know he broke up with her over a guy. OMG. Thunder strike on her so hard.. =( I can feel her..

Religious belief

2010-11-08T07:01:00.000-08:00

I am not sure how many of you actually felt that peace of mind in your heart. But here I am, not boasting, not forcing but just wana blog how I felt as a Christian. I love being one for as long as I have come contact into it. It was not an impulse like some of my friend think that it is Joel that's why I am in it. I once asked God to let me hold on for a while before I am matured so that I can settled for it and finding a man who is a Christian(that was before Joel came in) and I seriously felt that Jesus heard me and than he arranged it somehow. In my teaching of Christian, yes I may not be in Church as long as those who are in another Church but I do realise a lot of wrong teaching have been done which I won't quote which Church though and most of the Pastor whom I go to Church last time can't quote which sentence in the bible said that we cannot do this and that. But the new one that I am attending to is very pleasant feeling about it and a lot of mistake have been reinforced and corrected it. God loves everyone and I mean everyone regardless of sex, religion and everything and I saw people typing in FB, God... Please.. Which God ya referring to when you said you anti Christ? Oh no, don't get me wrong I am not trying to say that you are not referring to your own God, but those people who usually put God.. Please.. usually have no religion so I am thinking which God ya referring to? But anyway, my point is having the Right one in life is important so that you can put faith into everything you do, I attended the recent one, human may fail you but God won't (True! How many times have a human fail us and always?). You may shake but He won't shake and thank God, my life would be perfect. But still, enjoy your religion belief though, I am not trying to sell Jesus or anything, is just that I wana blog it out only.

Pervert encounter at Bugis
Dear parents of the future generation which includes me! Please do take note of your own child behavior and pervertic behavior, I was walking with Joel one day in Bugis and than while we were walking, it was quite a busy day with lots of people and I saw this kid coming towards me and I thought he was swinging only but he touched my private area and he laughed and pulled by his father, he continued to touch every girl that walked past, I regret not telling the father that I am going to call the police. So what you are a kid? If you are my child, you would expect ten thousand slap from me. This is not the freaking kind of thing you should at ur age! Parents always complain and complain, PLEASE look at what type of child you have bring up! Pervert shit! I hope that child hand was chopped off seriously at that moment of time but well is over, and don't let me see ya again! I remember your nerd face, KID.

Who don't understand
I was reading some blog of my friend. They always state that no matter what, we are not them, we don't understand them because we don't stand in their shoe. I am like this people are younger than me and why would they even say why I DON'T understand them? They claimed they go thru a lot, but compared to me, they are nothing. Friends saying take care because they cared, at least THEY CARED and type something to them, at that moment of time, we think about them. Of course, I am not trying to compare, but than again, how poor thing can you be comparing yourself to those third world country kid and putting yourself into a poor plight and than when you do that, people of course say TAKE CARE, what else you want them to say or do? How poor thing can you be when you are not forced into prostitution and even becoming maid? They have no choice because they are damn poor and need money to survive. I really don't understand because it hurts so much and was being accused when I am not wrong. I really hope ten years down the road, we would still be friends.

Well, holiday starts, saving money like hell, aiming to go China with Min they all next year. Yi Ru, I realised I send the message to your hp this morning ZZZ. It was yesterday her flight but be safe, God blessed you! Wang min, Alina, Lynn, please enjoy your attachment I prayed that all will be smooth. Bf would be safe everytime he go for overseas mission. Soon, we all will go different ways. Hate that day coming.

In 5 years time,
1) Get a Degree in Nursing with Joel in private university
2) Get advanced diploma in Emergency Nursing (hope so)
3) Get married with Joel (LOL)
4) Be a nurse clinician and kick out those Nurse who anyhow do their stuff. (MUAHAHA)

In 10 years time,
1) Work in Clinic
2) Have 2 kids (Hopefully twins la, save trouble and I prayed for painless one)
3) Earn 100k in a year. (LOL, will come true)

Don't come my blog and laugh at what I asked for hor! =D

HSE

2010-11-03T04:46:00.000-07:00

Am in HSE today for attachment, I went to Shara house and ate lunch, I ate a lot =x. Happy to see that Shara family functioning as normal. Learn to play mahjong with patient and in the end kena scolded way to the max. No joke. But than I suddenly miss all the companion. Yi ru, Dorcas, Wang min, Alina, Lynn, Leo, Sandra, Shara and Rizuwan. I think we have to meet up, they are the kindest soul I have ever seen on earth, even of thinking them now, I felt that my heart missed them a lot. The purest friendship of all. Whenever I see my friend when on attachment, I also feel that they changed a lot, I hope that will never happen to all of us, God have blessed them with good health and I don't want any horrible thing happen to my friend.
I am going night cycling on this friday with SJAB people, hope that my health will turn out ok, because I am such a person I can't miss any sleep. It is mine and his together six month, suddenly realise, when you miss the wrong one, you tend not to think about the wrong one. In life, is a miracle thing happens when you and someone are together and ending up not together, isn't it a pity, that forever is no forever from a guy who promises? But still there is another one on the way to give u a forever, happiness is not a forcing type but I hope that my happiness in the future will no longer filled with unhappiness and sadness but covered with love as love keeps no record of wrong. Encounter too many death, too saddening that I am so gonna cherish my friend.
Dear friend,
Although I know that sometimes you think that I am damn bastard, I am very sorry about it and it doesn't mean that I don't cherish my friend at all. In fact, I cherished them a lot and somehow I handle it wrongly. Please don't leave me =D. Cheers my friend, we have a long life to go together.

Tired

2010-10-28T03:04:00.001-07:00

Seriously, I am really tired man. Yesterday slept well and my leg seems to be very weak and around 1pm, i start to sit around not because I lazy because I shag man. Today saw KC early in the morning when leaving from Joel house, I say hi to him. Well, there is no forever enemy though so I just say hi to him, one more friend is better than one more enemy. Was busy doing slide and presentation but still CI say it was alright or good but I don't like the way our team behave, laugh and not serious. A bit worried for what CI might write in my log book, hope it was okay. Yesterday my team was a little bit busy and a lot of things happen, one patient fell and one patient fell away. Hai. So sad, that patient is very very healthy looking, can walk, can talk, than in the evening, insert one NG tube than passed away. Life short, seriously cherish it.

Disgusting!

2010-10-23T00:33:00.000-07:00

Pirahan is a way disgusting show! If you wana see a lot of disgusting body parts, you can go ahead and watch. A lot of adult scene.. HAHA.
I am sick. Not as in fever sick, but flu sick though. I got one day MC on the coming monday! I now feeling a lot better but still the the body cant seems to function properly. =(

Feels good

2010-10-20T17:47:00.000-07:00

I feel good =). Even though I am without my voice, flu++, sputum++. My beloved cousin whom I have missed for years found me! =) Anna! The one whom I always played with when I was younger. I stayed in her place for a while due to my father re-married that time and he don't want me and my brother to know so we hid in their house for a while. I used to be amaze by her nails~ OMG. It is short, I mean DAMN SHORT. Is like half of a normal nails. EEWW. I remember that max, and she loved to eat this assam ayam thingy, spicy max! LOL. We sleeped together at night also. She just texted me saying she loved me and asking me to go back see them. =). I feel good. It is like when God is around, everything goes smoothly. I met Hui Xian a while ago, one of my very close friends when I was like 18, 19? She and her bf doing good, she is now in army and enjoying her life. I hope she will still be fine and everything well for her. All my cousins are getting married and with children huh! What a life of enjoyment? AHAHA. Nope, I am going to enjoy my life first before having a child! I am so going to meet Anna soon! I missed her dearly! When she found me, you know what is on my mind? I am like who is this person? Than look closer again, THAN FLASHBACK~~ hahah. So fast. I miss you guys man! Ok, when we were younger, we are damn childish can, I remember I'm fighting to be pink power ranger, if you guys still remember what is power ranger! HAHAHH. Of course I win, I have always love pink since young huh. OMG.

Tired

2010-10-19T06:43:00.000-07:00

I am coughing like mad, sputum +++, no voice. Im suffering. But I believe that I will be fine soon. Today was a long day though, sleepy while waiting for Joel. *Yawn* max, but he still in gym, but still in the end, holding on to the thoughts that I will see him soon will endure. Soon left one more week I will end my attachment and pay day is coming. Hehe. SJAB got BBQ this sat, I got SJAB meeting this sat and group presentation meeting this sat. Awesome right! Argh! Clashes like mad. Ok. Joel fetching me soon.

Testing out our new camera~

2010-10-16T22:27:00.001-07:00

Lately, Joel and me went to Sim Lim Square to buy a camera, which is DSLR, our aim is to buy good camera with good battery life and good quality pictures. Well, so yesterday we go and try the camera for one whole evening. It was really good.We took about 300 plus picture and the battery life is still full. So today take more again =)

Hai

2010-10-14T06:38:00.000-07:00

Shit la shit la! I know I can nv be ur gd daughter than your awesome son la.. Give him all what ya got! I don't want a cent from you!
You disgusting thing that have been born, stop cursing me can or not! You think you loud I scare is it? Siam la~
If u angry with me than angry la, I dont give a damn la. Ask me pack my thing go, I will lor! I am already so tired why must make my life hard. I already hving fever now but u don't care I know!

Terribly upset

2010-10-12T19:28:00.000-07:00

First time after so long, I have seen my friend and then I cry. Is not as in big crying but is within a few seconds because hoping that she won't be so sad. I heard 2 news that made me sad this year, Hwee been mother passed away and shara dad just passed on yesterday. It is about cherish, Maya said that must cherish and listen to those whom are still alive. True. Who want to regret? Be strong my friend! Cry isn't show of cowards but shows of love and can't bear. Shara said to pray for his dad and I believed that more people pray, more blessing he will received. hai. I will learn more about being patience with patient and relatives and I really now do understand why they are so worried sick.

Crap

2010-10-11T02:07:00.000-07:00

Today first day of attachment is really a fucking crap though! Enter the ward, no one welcome us than expect us to walk around in the ward first than we sign in. Lucky we sign in the right book. Than never mind, was damn sleepy and the worst thing in the morning was the bus went the wrong way! ARGH! Nvm, I am blessed so managed to reach in time, saw dorcas and shara along the way.. than ward CI say wana give us hair test, she is going to turn our cubicle fan on to the maximum, see whose hair didnt fly, if we passed that test we passed. _|_. Seriously _|_. Never mind, I was being said in my face about my colored contact lense. What's wrong? Can't you tell me personally? I know Asian not suitable for my AQUA color, not blue color, don't have to tell me in front of so many people right? You think I am like 16 or 17 years old? Than say use hair gel, hair wax, hair cream. HELLO, my hair is THAT SENSITIVE! If I used any of these, my hair will drop, drop never mind la is it? Than what about my sensitive scalp, I am so fucking sure you will see a lot of flakes! Aiya, fuck la!

Headache!

2010-10-08T04:00:00.000-07:00

headache headache headache I hate you. To the max. if i can kill u.. i will. ARGH.

Wow.

2010-10-05T18:39:00.000-07:00

CC cream coming out to beat BB cream. Crap because both are created by same country. CC means color control. ARGH!

My thoughts for now.

2010-10-04T18:51:00.000-07:00

I realised I am a COMPLICATED person. My feeling run and go very fast which I also don't understand why and within seconds, my mind just switch.
Anyway, went to Shara's house to eat, must say no matter how much I eat, I felt full but still feeling like there is a hole in stomach for me to fill up, just can't fill up that space and than I asked Joel, he say yeah, he is feeling the same. Is it because we must eat rice as that night I didn't eat much rice though. Anyway, was so glad to see the girls again except min, whom still in China now enjoying her companion of her family. The time is tickling away extremely fast, where I almost forget meeting Joel's friend and than I hope I can stay with them longer but still took a last picture before we head off but was total disappointment. His friend wanted to go clubbing with a special evening of kpop which means the club will play korean music so I thought can go and listen as well but not to dance, but when we reached there, apparently it was over, and no one even sms Joel or me to tell us that actually we don't have to go anymore. So when we supposed to leave already, Joel's friend say it is a complimentary ticket (because we asked him to buy ticket for us first), which means we can still go in even the kpop session ends, so ending only the 2 of us, they keep on grumbling that they wana go home, and we also don't want to waste the ticket, so we go in to the club, Zouk, because I have never entered it before so just wana go in to see. But we were denied entry, sadness to the max and really disappointed, after minutes of searching that place, wasted around 5 litres of petrol and none of the friends stayed, not even a word of sorry from them, we only spend few minutes there to say bye to them. I could really feel that Joel is really disappointed and upset, along the journey back, he was quite quiet, he took a longer route back because he say he is really upset because of meeting his friend, I could have stayed longer with my friends. We went to ECP after that to chill till 1am plus, after which Joel was feeling much better and so went back to his place. I just feel that sometimes, we should spare a thought for the friends around you, don't just keep talking about yourself and look at only your situation. This time round, his friend really is too much though.
And also, was feeling damn giddy and drowsy yesterday due to migraine, I slept the whole day till 3 plus and I didn't meet Lynn but I bet she was disappointed in me. But I have already sms her already to tell her what's happening. Met up with ITE friends though, we spend time talking about last time, update from each other. Most suay is, I saw my ex bf with his current gf, rode past me with his bike. I am seriously wondering who is paying for the bike because he is not that rich though, must have suck up his own mother money just to pay for it. And oh, I am not envious at all when I see you on bike with your new gf, so stop showing me that kind of face that you are better than me and stuff~ Is disgusting way to the max. Well, I think I better not contaminate my blog with your stuff.
Going to gym in later evening with Joel and perhaps swimming tomorrow. Ar. I am not fat at all. My weight is still da same. Attachment starting soon. Good luck everyone.

Congratulations!

2010-09-29T22:56:00.001-07:00

Congrats to the 100 post that I am posting it now! Just watched playful kiss! It was really sad that Seong Ju treated Ha ni like this. Hai. Suddenly felt sad because last time I am also involved in such messy relationship. I think is stupid la, you like just say like, because I feel that if you drag you are also wasting precious time to be together.

Just went to buy contact len as well, hair conditioner and exfoliator. Raining cats and dog though, almost slip and fell but lucky didn't.

Anyway, I have bought contact len and this is my third time using it, it is colored but I only bought it for 48 dollars and you can use up to 3 months which I think the price is reasonable, and although they say offer la but already passed like 6 months and they still having offer. It makes my eyes look bigger, brighter as well.

Yea, you may say I am Etude house fans la, in a way, I am also trying whether if their product is good or not, and I need an exfoliator badly so Etude house again. I use this magic enzyme peeling pack, it is a mask for around 5 minutes and than you use your hand to gentle exfoliate and all your dead skin is out, I just tried it at Etude house and all my dead skin is out. The best thing is that it uses yoghurt, well many of us knows that yoghurt is good for health but it is also good for skin =D. If you are my friend, haha, I bet you know that I like mask A LOT. So I bought one from Etude as well, but I haven't try it though, so maybe I try le than update here ba. Almost all the review I see from Etude seems to have good result.

The hair mask that I have bought cost me a bomb, you know usually I don't care much about my hair but it starts to worry me when I see my hair loss is A LOT. So, I think a good conditioner is beneficial for me, so I went ahead and get it. It smells good and the store girl said that it is easily absorbed. So, well, I just bought it. For the sake of my hair. HAHA.

Oh ya, and the previous blog I blog about I bought some mini pore from Etude house, the actual name is minisize U. So here's the picture. The review states that it is effective and good but I have yet to try it because I haven't finish my Eucerin products yet. And my baking powder facial foam.. HAHA. The name sounds cool enough?

The bag I bought in KL...

Suddenly browse through my birthday wishing from my friends.. =D

Well, and anyway I have passed my exam. I am satisfied with the result. =D So no more books for me for now. I really hope everyone of my friend will be blessed with a gd job and most importantly is keeping in touch and I truly will miss everyone of them. I hope next year we still can celebrate our bday together again. Or for long. =D. Good luck to all my dearest friend for creating a gd memory, I always thought that no one will accept ITE people but it was proven so wrong for our class. I heard of my friends suffer in other class but still don't despair. Jia you!

Our trip

2010-09-27T20:15:00.000-07:00

Shall blog it here first before I have forgotten everything.
On 25th Sept, it was a good day though plus it's my pay day! Wake up early in the morning like 6am to bath and change at Joel's house, am waiting for Joel to wash up and everything. His daddy send us to the Golden mile there, am very very excited. I realise I am always very gan jiong, when we reached there, we are the first one. Than just sat and wait for the bus to arrive. The bus is really HUGE when it came, so we sit in nicely and everything, they give us immigration paper as well for us to write, water to drink. The chair is good with massage as well, movies to watch and GAMES! So we sit in the bus while reaching the custom, queue was long but well not much people though. Than watched "The 10 promises" I think so, don't quite remember the title le.. it was really sad about a dog and a owner... Than went to eat, it was quite a big portion compare to the one that we haven eaten during Genting trip. Than went up to bus again, only left 1 and a half hour we will reach the place le, so slept till we reached. When we reached the hotel, it was a really TALL hotel, the tallest among there. HAHA. So queue up again to get the hotel room, and we even got people accompany us to go up to the hotel room as they have east and west wing, he even carried Joel's bag. His service was damn good, almost tipped him but he went off. The hotel have basketball court, swimming pool, gym, sauna!!!!! ARGHH!! If I knew it, I would bring swimming costume along!!! The hotel do also have indoor theme park, shopping center! So when we reached the room, the guy ring the hotel room 3 times, so called to chase away those ghost la. Than when we enter, to our amaze! Great room, hehe, with a living room, with tv, radio, bed was huge, toilet was separated with bath tub one room, toilet bowl one room, mini kitchen with free coffee and green tea!! ARR, the view is facing the cities! Extremely beautiful =D. So, we rested a while and off we walk, we walked till 11pm, we walked to twin tower, the shopping center here, but I would say that mostly all Singapore also have, whether is there any price difference I am not so sure la never even bother to ask! Coz thought of walking and eating only, but Joel got a Oakley belt for only 98 plus Sing dollar, God bless, from 300 ringgit to 200 ringgit. =) Than continue to walk back and go back to hotel room and put our stuff~ Than go hunting for food! The food here is really affordable and cheap, overall our trip only spend 200 sing dollars for 2 person. HEHE. I would recommend here if everything likes to shop, eat, club or play! 135 for everything NICE! Breakfast was given as well, awesome max! Eat all you want, BUFFET FOR A BREAKFAST! =D The overall trip was really awesome! The next I am aiming for the Cameron highland strawberry land! HEHE!

This SUCKS

2010-09-23T17:02:00.000-07:00

Ok, LAME. My last day of attachment, is on afternoon shift. This sucks to the max man~ Anyway, tomorrow I am going to set off to KL to enjoy the scenery and thanks to Chng Hwee Been for your camera despite how tired you are~ Thank you so much, I am so gonna to buy a new camera!!!!!! If not, I would need to borrow here and there.
I hope tomorrow trip will be a fruitful one!! I am so excited for it. =D.
Done my case study and stuff, but I realise when I go to Joel's house, I forgotten to bring along the survey and the card -.-" sian to the max! But is ok, Joel is sending me to work today. Yesterday was doing shift work, I realise some of the nurses here seriously no team work. Got one SN just came over to Nurses Station than ask the only one staff to go help in triage, but there is no other nurses here she said. Than the staff seems like angry and walk off, but there is one incident, I am quite angry about this staff. She have already many juniors in the nurses station plus 2 student nurses, I am the only one helping out in triage and there's only one nurse in triage plus the fact that patient flow in rate a lot. She still ask me to help her do ECG after I have just send the file in for Dr, than I tell her nicely I am in triage, she say triage got people is it? I said have(Wa lao, no brain ar, so many patient no triage meh?) than I am also thinking that she have 2 STUDENT NURSE to do sai kang for her and still need one more?? Wherelse I am the ONLY student nurse for that ONLY poor staff there and she have so many! Don't just think about yourself and get your BUTT moving! It is already big enough! I also don't know what the hell you doing man! Well than anyway, time passed fast =) which makes me quite happy! HAHA.
That's about it! =D Jia you everyone!

Sad posting

2010-09-22T01:36:00.000-07:00

I seriously think that A&E is a very sad posting, I have never realise it since today. Yesterday, brought in one dead and today I conducted CPR on the patient itself and I really tried my best until my hand wana break, really! =(. But of course, patient never survived. Life so short, you never knew when you gonna die. But I believe that God will only take you away when you are ready.
I lately find someone seriously damn irritating, is like when you ask me question, I answer you to my best ability. But you don't exactly have to ask another person infront of me to tell me whether my answer is wrong or right. Nursing is about personal experience and protocol, if you don't trust my answer than NO NEED to ask me and irritate me to the max really. I am not angry or what so ever but I think is seriously damn rude can.
A lot of thought running through my mind, sometimes I browse through my close friends profile and than when I realise she can happily go out with other friends, I felt very very pissed. She even say that she will come to the outing no matter what but in the end, didn't want to turn up. Is our friendship that cheap? Though initially I wasn't disappointed but I AM NOW. Seeing your smile, I knew we bound to end up being no friend anymore. Sometimes I know that in life, we will lose some friends and made some friends.. I still believe that friendship can last forever. I am sorry that if I am always with my boyfriend but if I can make it I will sure go.

There is forever in friendship. Don't forget we can only be friends for this lifetime and after that we don't know where will our new life be. That's why I really felt sad each time I lose someone. =( Cherish it.

Etude house

2010-09-21T05:06:00.000-07:00

Lately bought this, unfortunately I cannot find any review on the product. But decided to give it a try though because skin cannot always use the same product else it will have no effect after a long time.

Anyway, I too have bought their toner and pore astringent, which I think is damn useful for me as I have many big open pores. So I decided to give it a try as well and I spend around 150 and I get a free membership as well as a free umbrella and BB cream, but well I have so many BB cream, 2 BB cream and 1 BB powder. Crazy shit me. But faceshop that BB cream I should say it doesn't suit me at all, the color was off and the smell omg, but I gotta admit that it makes my skin looks better or I am dreaming? But I prefer etude house BB powder though, as you know when you remove the powder you felt more secure as no clog pores.

Anyway this is the BB powder that I am using, unfortunately I cannot find the face shop BB cream at all. I am currently comparing products of Etude house and The Face Shop to see which is better, apparently, Etude house seems better as it doesn't clog my pores but face shop does. I do remember on occasion I bought rice water facial foam from Face Shop, it wasn't that good. So, am still trying and I think my face is getting better. Oh yea, aloe vera is most skin most effective treatment for scars and pimples, if you have enough money, buy some real ingredient of aloe vera and apply it on your face everyday, it does works. Good luck for those who are still looking for products! =D

Irritating!

2010-09-21T04:35:00.000-07:00

I seriously felt that this blog is not mine anymore as some of the irritating fuckers keep on posting on my blog promoting their fucking thing! I dont give a damn on what you are trying to promote but please can don't make spoil my blog or not! Fuck! I cant even post any comments! Like have got virus! Irritating shit you know! Who can help me in editing my whole blog again! ARGH! SHit those fucking people la!

Oh ya, anyway was having attachment these few days and a few events going on. Today was a sad day for me! Haix. Death is like so common in A & E... till I cannot feel the sadness anymore... Suddenly I felt that I have an interest in A&E! Maybe I will apply for A&E here! But well, I am not sure whether CGH will give me or not la. Anyway, life is so tiring for me nowadays! Yesterday have a gd gd sleep! So good! Anyway this saturday going to KL with Joel.. Hope is a good one ba.. kk..

What's wrong

2010-09-09T18:49:00.000-07:00

Was watching news yesterday and knows that one of the small church pastor wants to burn the Quran of the Islams, was so disappointed in that act because I am a Christian myself. Why would there even wana and think of doing such an act and thinking that God will even allow it? Burning them would cause even more world war between Islamic believers and Christian, and some of Americans are still in those Islam dominated country. Please really do spare a thought for them the risk of them getting killed in those country! I really don't understand with what's wrong with the people nowadays! Why don't you just work, enjoy your life, brushing up on your skills and do what you want so long it doesn't involved in hurting people! Stop thinking that you are correct, even in the Bible, it also did stated that not to go for an eye for an eye, if you started it, it will carry on! I don't want another world war, I don't to live in fear everyday and I also don't want to lose any of the Islamic friends! Oh my! I really hope tomorrow YOU all DON'T DON'T burn the Quran please! Is their Hari Raya Festival!

Weird

2010-09-08T04:30:00.000-07:00

Was browsing through facebook and realise my secondary school was there too. He is the type of teacher I really disrespect to the max, when I was in secondary school, I reported to him because he is the discipline master about some gang fight at some block. Our principal told every teacher not to leak out is I say as to protect me from those people as they have gangs outside and I was being in charge by one teacher to send and fetch me. In the end, SOME MORE HE IS THE DISCIPLINE MASTER, he go tell one of the girls that IS I AM THE ONE WHO SAID IT! CAN YOU BELIEVED IT? And than, in school I was having a hard time la as many people avoid me because they scare got trouble ma, and than you will know who is ur best fren la. BUT I REALLY DISRESPECT THAT TEACHER TO THE MAX. To think he even so thick skin to go on facebook. Sorry but I really disrespect him so much, because of him I have suffered in school.

Yeah, another incident, like I am saying I browse through facebook, suddenly thought of this girl. She is fake to the max can, hai, she treat other people nice... but than will still backstab u? Why? Some woman can really be that scary.

Another girl, her status was,"Can you stop whining like a b****? Break up only cry for 2 days is enough!" Hello, you think everyone like you keep changing boyfriend ar? You look good is because you put on make up ok? Is because you didn't love that person deep enough that's why every relationship you won't cry or not more than 2 days! Why I am so angry about her is that she treated me like that! Last time, when I broke up with my ex boyfriend, you know what the hell she do? She hang up my phone when I always stand by her and talk to her! And in the end, we both agreed to end our friendship than why now so freaking good to add me back in facebook? I am so not interested in you, the result of breaking friendship makes me very upset with myself as I really don't know is it my fault or theirs! Anyway, with your bad temper, I doubt u will go far and make very gd friends. She is not a really gd friend, the type who will dump you aside, when you need someone so badly. Last time, I only had her as my friend and I just lost my ex at that time, I really felt lonely and depressed. But lucky I managed to go through it. Another girl, who self said that she don't wana be my friend anymore, gave me her msn. Well. No point, she deleted me from msn, and everything. These 2 friendship are the that I hold very dearly to my heart, yet they broke my heart. Hai, those days so young, I cried a lot. Is not that I don't cherish but I am afraid to lose any again.

Emo today!
But well tml I will be fine again! =)

Exams finally over.

2010-09-08T03:31:00.000-07:00

I have been really tired and I really seek understanding and stop questioning me. Hai.

Suddenly awake

2010-08-22T20:45:00.000-07:00

I suddenly realise that a few more days will be my birthday. I didn't ask for any celebrations but rather I hope for this year birthday would be a peaceful one. Last year, I have celebrated with some friends that come to my house. But it wasn't a pleasant one as some of them gives up my birthday celebration due to last minute clubbing, working and lots of excuses. I have also celebrated with Yiru, Alina, Wang Min, Lynn plus stay over at my house with a steam boat and movie at night with them. All this small details are good reminders of next year awesome birthday celebrations but this year one I only ask for peace. No more unhappiness, happiness is always what I always asked for. I wished that my exam will pass and soon to become SN, I hope I am more mature enough to handle more cases of patient, do something more for them as well. Last time, when I always go for attachment, I always do what is on the job scope I am suppose to do i.e. do I/O chart, slack. But now I realise, nursing isn't that simple, is not just do one thing slack, than do another thing, slack. Is more about on learning on the job, getting used to the routine and also going extra mile for the patient as well. My stingy heart is not ready to love and give as much. This isn't going to work. I will and also pray to give more love, it will always be happier to give than to take. I believed most of us knows of this fact, I am always happy giving than taking, because almost all of things in the world I have. That's all.

Joel's birthday celebration and YOG duty

2010-08-21T22:41:00.000-07:00

Joel's Birthday
Total of 3 days celebration for him, first is ME. Of course is me, brought him to Suntec for a meal. Actually is he brings me there, I foot the bill. Well, happy birthday dear =D. Hope you did enjoy the gigantic meal. It was really huge. I almost can't complete it and he too. Second day, was celebrated with Ganesh, May, Naveen and Haziq, we went to Sushi Tei to eat, because birthday boy wanted it. =). After which, we all linger around one of the playground which they often goes to, to open champange for him. On the actual day of his birthday, his daddy brought him a cake, well I bet he must be feeling damn awesome about it because, I guess that is after many years, the first cake and it's on his 21st birthday. I can feel the happiness that is in him although he is feeling sick, well patient are not restricted to happiness. HAHA. Once again, happy birthday dear, I bet this year birthday celebration is your most unforgetable one!

YOG Duties
It was real fast that the duty ends. I am happy that I can go for such meaningful events! It was really an eye opening which I believed for most of us. My duty was when all the athletes was competing, it was not on their practise days. I can feel all the anticipation when the atheletes are competing real fiercely for their country and they should be really proud that even if they get bronze or silver, it doesn't matter because they really put in their best effort. I was covering for takwondo side, it is an high risk sports event, without any one of us there, they will not start the games. It all went smoothly, I am so glad because I am able to go home on time every day. Earlier than the time stated, and God bless my side doesn't have any food poisoning incident or any casualty. The duty brings me to an understanding of the sports as well, like for example, if you kick certain area, you will get how many points, how the judge works, how the referee signal, and they can use a video replay card, if they think they score. Well, cheers for Singapore for having 2 bronze and I WITNESSED IT! Shafinah and Daryl, good work done! You have bring glory for Singapore, may your future be blessed and win more for Singapore. I hope that we can at least have a Gold soon. =D

Childish brother

2010-08-08T20:20:00.000-07:00

I doubt I can really tolerate you anymore. Although I know sometimes you are good towards me. But sometimes you have made me so upset with your behavior, I really tell myself sometimes the way you behave and the way you thinking is because the way our family is brought up. But is already how long and I can change but you cannot? The way you complain things to mummy is really really very unacceptable and freaking childish to the max. I have already used the toilet asap because I know you are awake already and than why do you have to complain? Is almost everytime! Can't you just accept it? I have tolerated your fucking smoking smell in the toilet for so long despite I have got asthma and almost choked to death because of covering my nose and mouth!Shut your mouth can or not? You are a guy not a girl! Guy should be more gentle and tolerance towards girls, further more, this house is not yours! Spare a thought for people can or not!You made me more than 100 percent not wishing to return to this house! I only will respect mummy from now onwards, I hate you when you smoke and I REALLY HATE YOU when you come home DRUNK EACH TIME and we CLEARED UP YOUR MESS! I really don't know what the heck you thinking and mummy still blames me for not understanding you when you all are the one WHO DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND ME at all! Mummy always stood on your side and claiming I'm the one who don't try, BUT LOOK WHO IS THE ONE WHO DON'T TRY! You come home and goes, drunk and come back. Come back take money from mum! Don't even bother to talk to me, complain this and that, SINCE YOU ARE SO FREE, WHY DON'T YOU HELP? Why are you so big man idea? WHO ARE YOU TO TELL ME ANYTHING? I try until I wana give up! People are selfish, I am also selfish, I admit. But who doesn't, yet always say I'm the one selfish, don't you either want something for yourself as well no matter how kind or good you are? Don't you even carry the wish that I hope to have certain things! Shut up your mouth before I really scream back at you, loser!

Sorcerer Apprentice

2010-07-30T23:13:00.000-07:00

Did I spell it correct? Haha. Yesterday went to catch this movie because Naveen wanted to watch it. So yup, off we went to watch this m0vie. Went to tampines mall and century square to see the available time that they have so that to save cost. But in the end, we managed to watch it at 9.50pm at tampines mall! =) The movie is about finding some kid to kill the sorcerer, anyway the effect was really nice and cool. I think is good to watch but if u don't wana watch, is ok =).
Suppose to swim with yiru yesterday but the weather was damn irritating as it rains throughout the day, so I went to Tampines 1, TM, Century Square by myself to buy things for my mum as she asked me to buy some stuff. So off I went and I even went to Bata to buy shoes and after which I was approached by a lady to take some survey and guess what, she guess I'm 25. -.-" Pretty insulted as I don't look like 25 la!!!
I must remember to do the report on the previous group on what they have done. I almost forgot, so later after I have bath, I will do house work, follow by report than going to celebrate Charlotte's birthday =). Happy sweet 21st birthday, I hope those guys can come up with an idea to make it memorable. HAHA. Ok, so off I bath. Bye.

Great!

2010-07-28T18:31:00.000-07:00

I am so damn tired yesterday for waking up at 5 to bath in the morning and need to reach school by 7am. On the way to school, realise I have totally forgotten about the helmet that I have remind myself over 10 times! So no choice, message Joel to bring spare helmet for me. While I am on my way to my usual place, I saw Khalis and he was much pretty shocked to see me I guess. So waited for Shara and off we went to school together, I guess if I leave school, the thing I will miss is also waiting for her to go school together as we have been going school together for 2 years. Although I know I am so damn talkative, but still she have been patient and have listen to my sadness and everything.
We reached school and thinking that no one else have reach yet as it was raining too. The weather is really nice yesterday =) I love it. So when everyone almost reached by 7, we went up to get all the necessary item for the event. So we set up and Ms Lee bought us BIG BREAKFAST! First time in my life, I have never seen SO SO MUCH BIG BREAKFAST which of course brings a smile to all of us after the setting up of many many stations. Our "crime scene" attracts a lot of people that were walking past and of course some are rude, but still never mind. I remembered I talk a lot a lot, the answer is 1095 sticks of cigarrettes will be puff away if your average stick is 3 sticks per day and you have wasted around 547.50 in a year. HAHA. I say till I can remember. But never the less, STOP SMOKING YOUR LIFE AWAY PEOPLE! Man, you will look real ugly if you continue to smoke with a face filled with wrinkles, yellow teeth and yellow nails. That is what happens to my real brother, everytime when I see his teeth, I am really disgusted. After the event, went straight to nurses day and national day celebration!! Ate candy floss =), pink in color =)).
After that, went to Joel house and sleep a while than together with his friend watched "Despicable me". SO CUTE THE LITTLE GIRL but I am not so sure about the little girl name. And the yellow potato keep on AHAHAHAHAHH. SO CUTE. LOL. Than went home and sleep. Very nice sleep I have. HEHE. okok. Going school soon. Ganbatte everyone. =)

Disgusted

2010-07-26T06:35:00.001-07:00

There used to be this girl who likes to snatch people things.. including bf.. After years of being together being with the guy she snatch and cruelly ditch away her ex because of him.. Now she ditched him.. for another new guy. Now she is officially dumped by that guy and now she crawls her way back to the ex. Pathetic. Why make urself looking awful today? But perhaps guy can forgive ba.. I see her face i dont know whether should I laugh ?

Hai. Life Short. Cherish. =)

Shut up!

2010-07-26T03:45:00.001-07:00

On sunday was a super rushing day man! Went to expo wanted to buy lap top. So angry, got this 2 girl keep talking to us, I tot Joel will reject and he thought I will reject and wasted our time and they keep talking than in the end is wanted us to buy some stupid prudential saving plan~ Say what every month we save than got interest than can use only one portion of it. Shit ok. Wasted our precious time to go shop for lap top than rush to gym than to church. Irritating. No more NEXT TIME!
Finally got my modem worked! So happy! =D. Thanks yiru for bringing me go else i think i will get lost. Seriously. Hai really can feel the day of our school life are coming to an end. =(

I'm so sorry

2010-07-24T17:42:00.000-07:00

This post, reflects my guilt. I hope I'm not changing much though. I wana say sorry to yiru for nt handing in my part for the management and she have done it for me. So so sorry. And that I think basically our project don't have anything wrong because we are answering to his question and that he did not take note of our heading and where we are tackling at. I should say this is the first time we are doing and I think the slides are fine.
Secondly, I felt guilty because I am scare I'm drifting away from my group of girls. I seriously should be more balanced. I pray for that. Because I don't wish to lose any of them. Too precious to lose any.
And lately, I hope u know what u r doing. Sometimes some people have their own idea and I think u need to respect that. Everyone have their own plan and point of view but is as if u are possessed with ur own idea and what u think is gd. In earth, there's no such thing as free lunch in it. If there's really free lunch, nobody would even be working right? Just wait there and wait for money. Is really offensive when I rejected your idea and you just don't even bothered to reply. Probably your character is already like this or perhaps I didn't know it at all? I'm so so disappointed into the change u are in now. I have tried to understand and rationalize the way u r behaving now, u r not saying anything.. U run and go.. Do u even know what are u doing? Do not.. Do not.. Do not.. Force ur idea on me if u don't want me to dislike u. If one slap would make u wake up, I will do it. Last lap le, my girlfriends, I can feel the days are coming very fast. I will not ever forget this piece of friendship, this time round I will put in effort for our wonderful friendship. :) hope u guys do well in life!

Terribly upset

2010-07-06T20:11:00.001-07:00

I'm v upset abt thE skills that I'm being assessed today. She say I nv say that I will hyperoxygenate the patient when I infront of her bagging the bag when she just stand there and chap other student... Than accused that I breached the sterility when I didn't even take out the whole tube... Nvm.. Say my tape not long enough.. When I'm being taught in another way... Say my theory not there.. But the thing is I was not given chance to say anything... Hai life sucks!

Feeling bad

2010-07-06T20:11:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I do things without thinking and making another person irritated I felt angry with myself with some behavior especially.. I hope I can change to become a better person. I just feel that I suck at times but who doesn't. I have faith in God that his presence will remind me that I will be better and gd. I hope that he will be alright and God bless. I really don't know what type of person am I already.. All I want to say is that I didn't do it on purpose and I just have no control over my rapid mind. It just run and run.. V fast.. My heart is racing now because I'm nervous but I pray for peace and His presence when I'm doing the skills. Is already 11.13am.. But my bf still haven't reply me, I hope, I really hope he is hving a fine time. Argh! Think of it, I'm really very bad toward him with my selfish mindset! All I need is just faith and trust but somehow or rather the past came floating by. Can stop or not? I'm already stressed as it is. I want to be happy.. Okok... Back to reality.. Wish me luck though.. And wish yiru get well soon. :)

You die on me

2010-06-30T21:13:00.000-07:00

I think sociology paper cmi le :( im so upset with the marks allocation because if u forget one point that's it so many marks gone. I think for the first time probably need a re exam. Suay.

Why you cannot walk away from it? :(

2010-06-28T23:51:00.000-07:00

There is this lady whom used to be my mdm in Sjab. She is a very soft and nice lady, her first boyfriend is a fat pig with no brain. He himself break up with another girl just to be with her. In the end, who get it? My mdm. Ur ex gf keep on calling her up and send email to her and blame her why she snatch u away from her. Don't u feel bad at all? And now end up with someone so much younger still get ditch. My mdm, meet another guy, I thought she will be happier, who knows! Break up also and not long after found a new gf so fast because of what? Just because u feel that my mdm don't suit you and that girl in the same school
of yours suit you? Why must u 2 hurt her? She's not sad enough u mean? Where have all your heart gone to by hurting and making her cry and is you guys fault or loving another person when you are in a relationship with her and lied to her that the SMS u send to another girl is your friend only! Argh! Why! See her upset makes u all very happy is it. And the first one who break up with her, serve u right for being single because you have hurt her so much! Second one, why hurt her? You know how hard she walks out from the trauma? And yet again u chose to leave her? When you heartlessly delete all ur photo with her and replace with ur new current gf, do u even know that she still keeps the photo and living very strongly? My heart crys for her... You 2 how in the earth deserve any happiness... Just because not suitable than give up and not trying to compromise at all? Hai.. Love..

Die

2010-06-28T16:23:00.000-07:00

I think I die at seeing my bf wearing uniform, smart like madness. It is so proven I like man who wear smart u! Arr! Okok going for exam now :)

Sometimes..

2010-06-26T20:59:00.000-07:00

Sometimes
I feel that the earth without me is nothing. I'm just someone born to suffer and work hard but still get blame.
I feel that my mum don't give birth to me doesn't makes any difference because no matter what, she only sees my brother and always help him when needed. Me? Only when chores, trouble or even celebrations will just vent it on me.
I feel that I'm a transparent person, no matter what, others won't see me but their others. Why am I always not the one that you all will chose in the end? Why am I the one being vent on in the end? And worst of all, why am I always the one ends up with nothing? You want, I give. I give everything including my loves one. I give you all my everything and yet you hurt those things or person I gave u all. Why?
I feel that water brings me joy, lying in my bath tub is the happiest thing I have ever enjoyed or rather swimming where I can hear my own heart beat, breathing because that's where I know I'm alive. And in water I don't have to think all I need to think is swim. As far as I can.
I feel that my loves one will leave me and that's when my defence will come in. Friends come and goes but why leaves my life totally? Can't we just even send a message and you replied me? I tried my best for you all, why just can't text a message back and let me know my care is appreciated?
I feel that I don't deserve anything at all in this earth, God probably just send me down here to suffer and bring suffering to those happy people. I made myself life hard and yours too. Or rather I don't deserve ANYTHING at all be it happy physically, emotionally and mentally.
I feel that i'm a selfish bitch with no fucking brain and everything of me sucks like hell.
So why am I living? Answer is to get a life.

Mixed.

2010-06-26T20:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, tpsjab corp went to Universal Studio for a treat in getting Gold award for year 2009! Hope the cadets will be motivated to do some more for the corp in the many future years ahead! Universal studio is damn awesome with many many breath taking themes and streets which is located inside. The people in there are trained to welcome and encourage u after u take ur ride! With legal fire work even in their performance and I think u can give up ur national day ticket just to watch this. I love the mummy ride and the shrek 4d. The effect surprises me each time and I guess if stay there for long I would really live happily ever after :)). Sweet. Hoping to go with my friends and also my bf, hehe, so that we can all have fun together but still have to wait because all the rides not open yet especially the most thrilling one! I would say genting in terms of roller coaster, they will win but Singapore one they give you more surprise! Genting the rides are awesome but maintainence, services and themes suck they really need to improve. Cheating tourist money isn't long way to go man. I want to go tioman, Thailand and also Laos. I hope one day I can visit all the sea in the whole wide world. :)) being able to tan in many country I guess that's to me the most happiest thing on earth. After going universal studio, I went to find bf and pass him a monkey I bought in us because i think it looks like him. I wanted to buy something in there to give my friends but the thing is inside is not ex but is theme items sale. Inside only got shrek, Betty boop, Hollywood, mummy and lost world thing.. Just can't find anything suitable and their item are so common among all themes such as watch, pen, hair band, note book, cup... Bleah.. I can buy from
outside nicer. Anyway, after that went to watch movie "she's out of my league" with bf and his friends...
Was so tired and lucky I didn't fall asleep in the movie. I was offended by the movie though, well how could we compare looks when it was being born to be like this? We can't chose right and obviously the woman all look alike yet the script was "and makes her look like a pig", I mean HUH?! If she looks like a pig, we Asians look like 100 times like pig. And the movie was f all the way.. Hot body, nice complexion plus a guai face means hot to guys? I don't really understand guys after all, after being with a hot lady than doubt yourself
for not suiting her? Well, complicated and it makes me feel da same! And went home to sleep. Now awake and guess what, I seems lost. I don't know where am I...

Hurtful

2010-06-19T16:42:00.000-07:00

It is rather hurtful to hear that your friends don't trust you or trust their whoever more than they trust us. Like what the?? Does it mean that all the smiles and everything is fake when they are with us? I don't know and I'm rather tired to hear all this thing right now because I am really not feeling very happy. Or rather upset. I am at a lost right now. It seems that there are too much signal here and there and is making me dizzy. I gotta find myself the peace that I have lost. I just hope life for me now is still and peace because I am rather tired when I know that I cannot walk out of this maze.

Yesterday.
I went gym with Joel, rather a fulfilling one. I don't know is it because I have grow stronger as I can do more or lift up more than what I usually do. I guess next for me is to level up and hoping to do more. I realise it is important to exercise and sweat it out. And especially I realise, morning do exercise is the best when that time in the leisure camp, my trainees and I run in the early morning. I feel good. =) but his timing is rather slow till the cadet complain. HAHA. WOW. Cadets complain coz you slow. Maybe next time I can try to lead them to run. Napfa is coming so I guess all the gyming will help =). After which, we went to eat =). Normal food court... than I went to his house, played PET SOCIETY. OKOK, I know is rather childish to like playing this kind of game but I just liked it. I visited ALL MY FRIENDS, which is about 300 plus and I think i sit infront of the computer like for 1 hour plus I think than I go home bath and quickly go his house. Was rushing for movie, lucky thing we didn't miss the opening at all because that is Joel most wanted to see movie so was hoping he din missed any minute or seconds of it. And again, went to eat because I am so hungry. LOL. Yes.. piggy.. =)) Than meet Khalis and we all go play pool together and I played a bit of Jurassic park. That game since my secondary school, I have been playing with woei leng till I think we graduate, till than I didn't play anymore. That machine brings back a lot of memory.. especially the one at tampines mall which now already remove. But still everytime when I walked past TM arcade, I will feel a bit of sadness, is like why last time we so closed yet now you chose not to talk to me anymore. Me and her is the best of friends among all, where we only have one another only. Is like wow, we can share a lot of things together, wear the same clothes together, celebrate each other birthday. When will that return to me? Time, you have taken away from me for so long. Hai. Anyway, menses coming soon, well, going genting in such condition seriously sucks. I now already feel the cramp, where the ovary worn out and "PIAK" from wherever it is la. Damn pain, I think I feel the "piak" yesterday, so I guess menses coming anytime. Than after that. HOME SWEET HOME in a taxi. Yawn, doing project now. Update anytime soon =)

Cherish

2010-06-17T18:36:00.000-07:00

You know.. life is short right. There are not many opportunities in life for us to do lots of thing. But I realised that the thing that we wanted to do is not the most important thing in life. I would rather think that cherishing people around you is the most important things to do. Like a simple treating them, buying things for them or even watch a movie with them is good. I shouldn't have keep walking in the same direction for so long and don't know how to look for a new direction. But now is different, there is a new journey up ahead for me, and is waiting for me to see the beautiful world.

For you, you know who. LOL. =D

Something that I want to type out

2010-06-16T21:17:00.001-07:00

I have been looking around people's facebook, looking through their photos.. I admit that I am not a very nice person though. I look at some girls clothing which I really thinks that it does not suits them at all.. Especially if you are erm... slightly obese at some area of your body. I agree that you got very BIG breast and you wana SHOW it all to the world, but please wear another jacket or what to cover up your other asset, I think it would be better. Of course, I am not trying to say you look bad although it does. MUAHA. okies. Some girls when they takes photo also very fake, what I mean by fake, is like when people ask u to pose and that person is whom you dislike and that's the type of smile I am referring to. Well, I guess there might be some people criticise me as well but I think that my fashion sense is not that bad either is just that I am not earning enough now. But still I think I can dress better even if it is just a tee and a pant. Love yourself and your body more. When it is obvious you need to lose weight, move it and get it done. When it is obvious you are skinny, get a life, eat something. Guys don't like skinny girls only lo, siao~ Because I am always hearing girls complaining I am changing for my bf. Wth, have you even hear about bf saying I wana change for my gf? Why must we change for them? I don't understand. Ok, I am not a very good gf by some definition of what is a gd gf to some guys. Whatever it is, be happy. I am so tired. Apparently don't know for what reason. The weather is so cold, that.. I am HAVING MY ATTACK NOW! ASS! OKOK

Share some picture abt me & him =)

2010-06-16T19:54:00.000-07:00

Sorry.. a bit blur... friends who knows me knows i gt shaky hands =)